Over the edge...

Just when I thought nothing else could go wrong...The dean of the college asks to meet with me only to let me know that I am not welcome back next semester as a result of my mental instability.

I had been feeling extremely suicidal (with a plan) prior to this, now I truly don't have anything left to hold me here. My plan was supposed to be a couple weeks from now though. I swore to my therapist that I wouldn't hurt myself this weekend however I have everything I need ready to go and I want nothing more than to end it...

On the one hand, I know I should be seeking help right now, but the thought of living through anymore of this is unbearable - I don't want to get better, I want it to stop.

I'm not sure what kind of response I'm expecting. I'm just not sure of anything.

 

Hi Faded Echoes. I'll be on msn all evening/morning until around 7am, if you'd like to talk with me. I hope you feel better soon. :hug:

 

You said you don't want to get better, you just want it to stop. Well it can stop if you get better. I know it will not be easy. You should at least try to seek help and wait until things are better to make a decision. There are other options beyond suicide. Exhaust them first. Feel free to PM me if you need someone to talk with. I will get back to you as soon as I can. :hug:

 

I understand the feeling of life being unbearable, as do many others here at SF so you're certainly not alone. I guess we just need to take things one day at a time but at the same time grip onto our hopes and things that make it worth us living, no matter how small. Even though you cannot believe it right now, you CAN get through this. Please stick around and use the support base you have to your advantage. Is your therapist helping you? How long have you been seeing them? If you don't think they are helping you perhaps you should consider seeing someone else. Take care of yourself. :hug:

 

please don't do anything to hurt yourself i understand how you feel. keep posting here pm me or anyone to talk. have you tried to go to another college or can you fight this decsion. is there anyway you could just take a year out to sort out how you feel? but please please dont hurt yourself.
take care
thinking of you
x