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Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Nessarose, Apr 29, 2008.

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  1. Nessarose

    Nessarose Well-Known Member

    I won't say what I took or how many but I overdosed today. From around 7:00 AM-12:30 PM. My stepdad called my doctor a little while ago (it's 9:00 PM) and left a message with some woman who yelled at him because he won't take me to the hospital.

    I feel horrible. I got sick, I'm cold and shaky, and my chest and stomach hurt really bad. Mentally I'm doing worse and if I still had the medication I'd be downing a lot more. I don't want to die but I can't take the pain. And now I'm embarrassed. My family are gossipers and they'll probably all find out.

    I just want someone to talk to. I talked to a friend over MSN but basically said i was better and feeling fine mentally/ physically. it seems like my family are avoiding me and i've only told online friends, because i don't want to know what my real-life friends would think. Probably say how horrible of a sinner i am for trying something like that.

    i feel like crap. i feel worse than that. i'm about to cry again. and if i did any damage to my stomach or liver than yay, gues swhat, even higher medical bills to come.
  2. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    nessarose, why won't your dad take you to the hospital? the lady on the phone was right, you should be getting checked over by a doctor to make sure that you haven't caused any permanent damage to your internal organs from the OD.

    please go to the hospital, or at the very least, to see your doctor first thing!

    do you have a counsellor? they also need to know.

    the time immediately after an attempt is a very fragile time. i was relieved i hadn't succeeded, but i also felt like a loser, let's say i felt an entire range of feelings from grief, to self-hatred, to despair. very soon, when i realized it gave me no relief, i started to plan my next attempt.

    please use this time to get some supports in place. it's so hard to face these feelings alone.
  3. Nessarose

    Nessarose Well-Known Member

    my mom and stepdad said they think i'm going to be fine and my mom's going to check on me tonight but it makes me feel like they don;t care. they're both disabled so it's hard for them to do anything anyway.

    i don't want to call a hotline, my psychiatrist will probably find out about the OD in the morning though when he gets to his office. i hate the hospital and i don't want to go ther e again, i was just there in December on Christmas.

    i feel horrible. i wish i had the pills still but i don't really want to die but i can't take this.
  4. music_addict

    music_addict Well-Known Member

    Ok you seriously need to go see a doctor as soon as possible. Especially, if your getting stomach and chest pains after the fact. I dont what the hell your stepdad is thinking.
    There is a very real possibility that you did some serious damage to your organs, especially your liver and heart. You said you dont want to die now right? well if you dont see a doctor and get checked out then there is a chance that you will die. GO
    On another note, I've also survived an attempt; so if you want to talk about it, then feel free to Pm me.
  5. Nessarose

    Nessarose Well-Known Member

    I seem fine. It's just that my stomach hurts and the veins in my left arm but that might not be related. My psychiatrist will probably call back today. My mom and stepdad are asleep/ out of it right now. If it starts to hurt bad I'll call the medical doctor. Thanks for your response.
  6. bleach

    bleach Well-Known Member

    :unsure: are you ok?

  7. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    What did you decide to do nessarose? How are you feeling? Please keep us informed. :hug:
  8. Nessarose

    Nessarose Well-Known Member

    I didn't call the doctor, it turns out my stepdad called a nurse in the E.R. that night and not the doctor's office. I don't know. They have the pills now and my mom's going to take the Nyquil (she forgot).

    Thanks guys, you're sweet and helpful.
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