Overdosing

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Keiran, Nov 26, 2010.

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  1. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    Sometimes xxxx because it gets me out of anything and everything. One day I wanted to do it to try it out, knowing I could've possibly died(although now I find out that although I took way over normal dosage, I probably would need double what I took to kill me). I got to skip school the next day since I was sick. I just laid in bed and never had to get up for any reason unless I wanted to.

    This week I'm on break since it's Thanksgiving. I had wrestling practice a few times, and I honestly hate doing wrestling now, but I'm kinda forced to do it. I did not want to go so badly that I took the pills again and made myself sick. Got me outta wrestling for the few days.

    When xxx, all the effects are fully active when I wake up, but after my parents see I'm sick, I go back to bed and when I wake up, all I have is a little stomach ache. But I got to just lay in bed all day and do nothing.

    It was great.

    I just wanna sit there and sleep and sleep and not do anything. Sometimes I wonder if death is like having the greatest sleep ever, because you sleep for such a long time.

    But unfortunately I have xxx I was taking earlier. I don't believe that I have anything like what I was taking, and sometimes I feel I just wanna go into my cabinet and find every pill I can and xxx.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 26, 2010
  2. You need to stop... you've been lucky so far. I've took loads of overdoses... not for the reason you're doing it but I have... and every time I was fine... until the last time. I was vomiting for over 8 hours none stop and by the end of it, it contained blood. I then started getting the WORST stomach pain you could ever imagine, it felt like somebody was ripping it apart, I was screaming the pain was sooo bad... I've never felt anything like it before in my life or since... I was rushed into hospital and was put on to two drips for 3 days. I was then put into physiotherapy. I've barely touched pills since... not even when I have a headache will I take any painkillers. I've felt my liver and kidneys starting to fail because of the damages of taking overdoses... you NEVER want to feel that. Honest. I suggest that you go take to your doctor about getting help... seems to me that your addicted to the pills that you've been taking. You need to get help before you do some serious damage. Good Luck and Stay Strong... you don't need the pills :).
     
  3. kote

    kote Account Closed

    i can understand how you feel and im hearing everything you say!!!
    life is so shitty sometimes and escaping and sleeping seems so much better, trust me ive been in bed for 3 years. but now i have nightmares about my sickness and sleep isnt so appealing. i can see that you need a rest from the pace of things in your life and this is your way to it. im sure you have a bright future ahead of you - or should i say i can asure that you will have a bright future ahead of you!!! but your problems are here and now and facing you each and every day. i dont like telling people what to do, thats just not me! but if i were you id get both my parents and sit them down and tell them exactly how you feel each day. if my daughters were you i would like to think they could catch me anytime and tell me anything on their mind.
    your parents love you and no doubt many other people. love is there to care for you and you should open up and say how stressful things are and you feel the need for a break.
    as for OD - ive done it a few times and it never works, just wrecks my insides and makes me suffer more. now just think if you could get medicine from the dr. to help you relax an take things easy. i do and 3 times daily take my meds and relax into life where as everyone else is running around crazy. i broke down and told those who loved me how i felt and we got the help. it wasnt easy at all but the reality is we all need a little help now and again.
    you can PM me anytime and i will listen and maybe tell you similar things that ive been through and the results. im not here to tell you what to do. i will support you and help all i can!!!
    please enjoy your break and think about talking to your parents, maybe now is the best chance. i take your feelings very serious and no doubt they will too.
    goodluck and all the best wishes!!!
     
  4. loopy

    loopy Well-Known Member

    You dont always see the damage you do from overdose straight away! It can make you very ill in the long term x
     
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Overdosing just so that you can stay home from school is a bad idea. Your organs can only take so much abuse before they begin to shut down. You don't want to get liver or kidney failure, or else you will be in much worse shape. Please don't take anymore overdoses. Why do you not like going to school?
     
  6. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    I'm not overdosing to stay home from school. I just did it the first time just to do it, but I ended up staying home from school. The next time was to stay home from wrestling practice.

    And I've read all this stuff about how horrible it is and how people won't even touch pills anymore, but it doesn't stop me one bit. I'd probably still be doing it if I had those pills.

    I just...I don't even know anymore...
     
  7. kote

    kote Account Closed

    please reach out to someone close to you and tell them how you feel.
    i know it is hard and can be embarrassing but its the best and safest option.
    you seem so tired and stressed. you need a break and the best way is to tell those close to you how you feel. you can go into as much or as little detail as possible but make it clear you need a break. people often try to push us on when we are tired ( some call it charachter building ) i see it as soul dstroying especially when you have reached your limit.
    please reach out. we all support you here but you need a physical and mental break for a while. keep coming back here and we will listen and support no matter what.
     
  8. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    It would be impossible for me to go to my parents and tell them about it. I just can't do it.

    But sometimes I feel I should get help.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 27, 2010
  9. kote

    kote Account Closed

    ok i understand how sometimes its hard to approach parents. so lets forget that idea. but any dr. will be apprehensive of giving you tablets if you have a past of OD. but you can try or if you have a school councillor or another adult you trust to help you through this tough stage ( yes stage - it will pass - i cant promise you how long though ) if you have an adult on your side the drs. are more likely to listen and take you seriously and give you the right treatment. god i even need my wife with me for the drs. to take me serious. its just that other pair of eyes who can confirm what you are saying. it sounds to me like you need some mild tranquilizers. i take them and couldnt get through the day without them, my wife was given some the last time we saw my dr. as she had stress and exhaustion - and you know what the dr. told us most of the staff at the hospital are on them which made us laugh. so seeing a dr. alone or with someone isnt a bad thing, its a coping mechanism. the right pills and change in brain chemistry can give you a whole new life or your old one back.
     
  10. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    You make it sound like it will all be better to see a doctor, and I want to, but I don't really have any other person that I could tell except for my parents...and I just can't seem to do it.
     
  11. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    you could start by calling a crisis line, just to talk to another human can make a real difference. consider it practice for talking to someone in real life. those crisis lines are staffed by kind, compassionate listeners. they will let you talk it out and give you some supportive advice. they have saved my life many times over. are you in the states? i could find some numbers for you.
     
  12. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    Yeah I'm in the states
     
  13. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    you could try 1-800-SUICIDE / 1-800-784-2433 (Toll-Free in the USA) or 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

    there is also the covenant house nine line http://nineline.org/index.html

    the numbers wouldn't show up on your phone so you'd be safe to call from home.
     
  14. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    Not quite sure what you mean. How will the numbers not show up?
     
  15. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    i just meant longdistance numbers usually show up on your phone bill but these are special 1-800 numbers so they won't display. you can call in complete confidence. or obviously if you call on your cell phone your parents would never know. i didn't think about that.
     
  16. Keiran

    Keiran Well-Known Member

    Yeah I'd probably just call from my cell phone
     
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