I have been so stressed out and overwhelmed lately, from school and other things, and all I want to do is hurt myself in some way. Thing is, if I choose to do so, I will potentially screw up everything I've worked so hard to obtain. I feel alone, like there's no one who cares enough to listen, who I don't think I will burden by telling them all the crap that goes on inside my head. I want to cut, and bang my head against a wall, and punch myself in the face, and scratch at my arms until they bleed. I want to jump, to <edit mod total eclipse method> If I do tell someone, what if they think I need to go to the hospital? Do I need to go to the hospital? Whatever the answer is, I won't go. I can't go. Not again. Not now. I've been doing so well, and just like always, the shit is hitting the fan. Recovery hurts; it's wearisome, drains me of life sometimes. I want out, at least for a little bit. Rid me of the anxiety and depression that plagues me. All I want to do is die.