pain killing

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by hollowvoice, Sep 21, 2010.

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  1. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    for over 6 months now ive been taking 50+ibuprofen pills before i go to bed in the hope that as the label says it may increase risk of a heartattack,now im taking them with 2 or 3 litres of red bull in the hope it will be too much for my heart to take,this is my current way of killing myself but it hasnt worked yet.after all the crap ive put my body through it cant be long
     
  2. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Andi you must be in a lot of pain to do this...are you seeing a doctor, therapist, are you taking antidepressants?
    I fear what you're doing is going to cause you health problems without actually killing you thus making your life more unhappy...
    please seek some help asap
     
  3. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    Yup, you are just going to inflict pain onto yourself.

    I've been taking excessive amounts of pain killers every single day for about 18months now. You'll just fuck up your organs, if you were to die it would be slow and agonising. Not a quick heart attack.

    IV summed it up.
     
  4. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    but even without the pills im dying a slow painful life if i do fuck up my organs at least ill get where i want to be eventually
     
  5. Domo

    Domo Well-Known Member

    :no:

    No need to inflict any more pain on yourself then what you already are.
     
  6. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    the days just started and i feel like ending theres no hope no friends,nothing but a desire to leave these thoughts behind
     
  7. stig

    stig Well-Known Member

    Andi, I don't know you but i do understand your pain. The way you have chosen to go is not nice. It is a very slow and painfull way. your organs will shut down slowly. you may not actually die either. you may end up killing your kidneys or liver and then have to spend the rest of your life on dialysis. Please don't do it. PLease get some help. if you need to talk pm me. I have been dealing with this affliction for 30 years. i really do understand.
     
  8. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    thanks stig i kinda know what im doing is wrong and slow and thats not what i want but its something i cant kick it seems harder than the drink which i kicked on my last attempt.the thing is if something were to happen and i ended up in hospital id be happy,i was happy in hospital where people cared/listened+if they were to say my bodys screwed it would give me the final push to end this life once and for all thered be less to live for than there is now
    PS is this your new job since leaving top gear .......lol
     
  9. stig

    stig Well-Known Member

    lol, i'm the other stig. the one from the dump. I know it's hard my friend. Are you on the mental health register? if you are you can walk into your local hospital and request that they put you into a mental health hospital. you will then have the care/support that you need.
     
  10. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    no not on any register,the troubles i have are my doctors iraqi and i cant understand a word he says and wasnt very nice to my mother before she died so i dont want to go,the samaritans i spoke with for a coupla months before going in to see them where i saw a 60/60 year old woman whose pet dog had fleas (i got bit),a counsellor still coulnt get my name right after a few sessions i mean how hard is it?i tried another doctor but couldnt get past receptionist without delving into my problem.i posted my thoughts of suicide on fb and all i got was itll get better or "cheer up"
    i just feel ive been unnoticed all my life and slipped through the net of a world which does care just not for me
     
  11. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    keep trying andi....change doctors and change counselors till you find one you're comfortable with and who listens to you...
    killing off your organs one at a time will be a very painful and long winded death...
    we're listening to you on here
     
  12. stig

    stig Well-Known Member

    definately change your doctor. you have to be able to talk to him/her. get yourself down to the hospital. they will have a psych ward there. talk to one of the people there. tell them what is happening, what you are doing to yourself and how you feel. they will be able to have you sectioned to a local hospital. i'm sure of it. when i tried the hospital sectioned me without telling my gp.
     
  13. Mr_Happy

    Mr_Happy Member

    It's not a good idea to take all those pills, you could do yourself some serious harm or worse kill yourself, i would do something more positive imo.
     
  14. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    just as well kill myself now anyway
     
  15. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Not unoticed here people care i wish you could get some help for you though antidepressants for one thing. Not good to shut down one organs very painful
    If you think hospital would be better for you sign yourself in okay to psych ward and get help that way. okay time to heal okay you are worth it
     
  16. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    ive a bad feeling,
    if there is reincarnation
    ill come back as me!!

    try and fix it while you're here this time andi..get some more help asap..
     
  17. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    i just dont know what i want anymore,i just feel like im not here anyway
     
  18. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    That is the depression speaking to you even if you get on some meds to ease up the sadness it is a start right.
     
  19. hollowvoice

    hollowvoice Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    wow havnt had any pills for about a week now
    but now im done im going to go out and get as many as i can and finish the hell that my life is im just sorry
     
  20. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    hey andi ... was it those insensitive bullies? please, please ignore them.
    You were doing so well not to have pills for so long...
    don't let them win...
     
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