Discussion in 'After Effects' started by warrabinda, Feb 17, 2011.

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  1. warrabinda

    warrabinda Well-Known Member

    my first post disappeared on me!
    as per forum rules
    i am not asking for methods, not even interested.

    what i want to know is if/when you have attempted, did it involve unexpected physical pain? did it waiver your decision?

    did you regret whatever you had done immediately or a short time later?

    was it enough to stop you doing it again?
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    For me the emotional pain thereafter was far greater than the physical pain, although the physical pain was quite great...and yes, it did make me reconsider how I deal with my problems..hope you are safe and OK..please let us know...J
  3. GoldenPsych

    GoldenPsych Well-Known Member

    I never expected to be so sick. The retching was awful and I wasn't bringing anything up. That hurt a lot. It just made me re consider methods not the actual attempt.

  4. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    no physical pain at the time, but yes, after i was quite unwell. mostly i was sad i didn't succeed. it's taken some time in therapy to be glad i didn't succeed.
  5. swimmergirl

    swimmergirl Well-Known Member

    It hurt like hell, which is why I am probably still here.
  6. Silverpuddle

    Silverpuddle SF Author

    Physically, it didn't hurt, although I expect it would have if I'd been better at it.

    The emotional anguish that drove me to it got even worse after I'd failed.

    I think it's possible that the moment of terror as my choice became irrevocable might have made me think twice about trying again. There's just something about being powerless over what comes next that I really didn't like.
  7. MissMisery

    MissMisery Well-Known Member

    It wasnt a suicide attempt for me, ive never yet actuallly set out to kill myself just have a rest in my mind. The last performance certainly put me off that kind of 'method' ive used this 'method' before several times for the same reason and yeah ive had bad experiences but never as bad as this one. I was in extreme physical pain and morphine wouldnt work, then i had awful hallucinations which wer the most terrifying thing ive EVER experienced in my whole life, the pain was bad, they wer unbelievabley intense and id never want to experience that ever ever again!

    However, I do feel rather peeved that it isnt an option for a break from the pressure, and now im kind of scared because im really down and have been again for some while but the past week things have happened and i feel so lost and alone but the next 'method' i will try wont be a rest it will be the end. I feel scared to think, scared to day dream, scared to sleep, its this deep black cloud over me and i cant see any light, its just closing in more and more like a tunnel ending in a cul de sac. No other way out.

    However much i can handle pain when it is inflicted upon me, i dont enjoy pain, i find certain types a release but i have a lot of coping mechanisms. I think deep down on some level no matter how bad you feel and how serious about suicide u feel, everyone has doubt and everyone has some fear. But it depends how much you want it, like with anything unpleasant tht gains a 'result' self starvation for example. I guess its how far you are willing to go in that mind set. Its dangerous no matter what level of thinking you are at in tht time. Peace and Love :)
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