i know i said i would not write on the main forum again but i cant cope with the silence i forced myself into anymore...moms birthday and anniversary of her death is on Thursday...i havent said anything yet to anyone...everything hurts, i wanna cry so bad but i will not allow myself, i learned to keep silent but its killing me. so badly do i wish to die and end the torment i have lived in since mom died but i know i cant...why her why? i need her so badly, I need my mom. :cry2: