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Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by oval, Feb 9, 2014.

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  1. oval

    oval Well-Known Member

    Now,i dont want to just throw that word around but thats what you can categorize this as. I dont like night time bc i become too damn paranoid. New years even was a high light again as i sat in silence in a corner, watching the front door while holding on to a baseball bat, a machete and a fake but convincing pistol. And my cell phone of course.
    Just now i just got done covering all windows with towells and piling up tough boxes infront of the basement door. And now im yet again just sitting here listening for sounds. My place has been broken in to before when the previous tendends were living here but what are the chances of that happening when my car is outside and all the lights are on. And what the fuck are my cats doing right now to cause that noise. That startles the shit out of me.

    My ideal place would be a bunker underground. But then you gotta worry about all kinds of ghosts and deamons haha can i get a break

    The reason im so paranoid i believe is that i didnt feel protected as a child. My father raised me by himself at the age of 67 and when i wasnt with him, i was staying at my 70 year old grandmother's house. I always felt that if something was to happen they couldnt be protect me. That instead, i would have to protect them, as a child.

    It has become a really a crippling fear. It was really bad 2 years ago. My therapist suggested i tell myself "i am safe" over and over again when i feel that way. I guess im just not very convincing
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Are you seeing a doctor for your anxiety your paranoia i hope so there are meds than can help you not be so fearful of living hun hugs
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