People are being fake

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Viper, Apr 17, 2007.

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  1. Viper

    Viper Well-Known Member

    I apologize if I hurt anyones feelings in chat as was not my intention. I also appreciate those attempting to help who didn't spit out bullshit in the process. Everyone will be at peace at some point. For those that are in pain and hate listening to these people talk about your life as if they know it better than yourself, I'm sorry. Goodbye All.

    For those that are in pain, coming here is the worst thing you can do. People say they care all the time here. What they really mean is "I'm concerned for you, but only as much as I care about some random person" If you are in pain constantly, such as myself, you get tiresome of hearing this over and over again, when it really has no meaning. The ones that say this are the ones that aren't in pain. They don't understand us. You see, if they truly understood, they wouldn't want us to continue life. They always say things like "it will get better" and other crap like that as if they were a goddamn fortune teller. I'm sorry folks, but they aren't. They are just saying what they are supposed to because they don't know what else to say. They know they don't know what they are talking about, and I am here to expose that. Don't listen to them. What they are doing is claiming that they know your life better than you AND if that wasn't enough, they claim to have some type of psychic ability. If you want to believe that, and take what they say to heart then do it. Perhaps you will live longer in your world of pain. To me, I would rather not. I would rather not have somebody claiming to know that things will get better without knowing me or any of my circumstances and allow my pain to continue.

    Then there are those that are not it pain constantly. They are the ones that I have been talking about previously. You think you are a fortune teller? Go win the fucking lottery, and stop telling people in pain that it's "OK" and "it will get better" because I dont think you know what you're talking about. Stop pretending to be some fucking hero because you're not. Leave the people in pain alone. Live your so called "painful life" and continue to do so because you don't know shit about pain. You constantly inflict pain on others by telling them things that you do not know anything about. Leave us alone if you’re going to do this because the last thing we need is bullshit. If you want to help, then be honest about what you say and not about what you think you should say. Next time you want to cause people more pain, think about what you’re doing.

    Recently I've been an asshole in the chatroom. I dont really give a shit. It's amazing how those that cared, all of a sudden don't. Could this mean something? It means they are either in denial that they actually do care for people, or they only care for people who aren't jerks regardless of how much pain they are in. They will never admit it to themselves though. They will never admit that those who once "cared" for me no longer do because they never did to begin with. Care isn't something that can be tossed around like that. You say you care about people who you dont even know, yet at the same time you dont care about those you don't know. You're all a bunch of fucking hypocrits. The whole chatroom thing started when I was banned from chatroom, but that is honestly besides the point. I'm glad that you all don't like me any more because frankly I don't give a fuck. What you've actually done is proven to me that everything I've said here is 100% true.

    I've already decided I'm going to kill myself. I'm not sure when, but it may be sooner than I had orginally planned. It has nothing to do with any of you, it's just my own thing that has ultimately led me to this decision. I'm not afraid of death. We all die someday. It would only matter if there was a heaven and/or hell or any other heaven or hell in the 1000's of religions but since there is not, then I'm not too worried about death. Eventually, the Earth will be destroyed either by asteroid, global warming, or nuclear war, and if for some reason none of that does it, the sun will eventually burn out and there will be no source for energy (although that would require extremely long time but it is inevitable). Think about it. Is anything you do actually matter after you die? Evolution will once again start over in many years and the cycle will continue. I've been dead for billions of years, and when I die I will be dead for trillions of years and beyond. It doesn't really matter.

    I apologize if I hurt anyones feelings in chat as was not my intention. I also appreciate those attempting to help who didn't spit out bullshit in the process. Everyone will be at peace at some point. For those that are in pain and hate listening to these people talk about your life as if they know it better than yourself, I'm sorry. Goodbye All.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 17, 2007
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    What exactly are you trying to achieve in this post?

    Do you expect people on this pro-life forum to tell people to go and die because things won't get better? Ever considered that maybe the persons point of view is not totally accurate because it is clouded by depression and often others staring in and offer advice and support that might help?

    But of course you can only be helped if you want to be helped, and you seem to have made it clear on many occassions that you don't actually want help.

    This shrieks of someone who is desperate for people to care and pissed off that people have not treated you as you want to be treated. Maybe if you were respectful and decent to others (which by your own admission you haven't been, certainly in chat) you might get the same back.

    I really do see hope for you because there is hope for everyone. You don't seem to want that hope, maybe one day you will, I hope it's not too late by then.
  3. Viper

    Viper Well-Known Member

    I obviously do not expect people to say such things. However, I do expect that if thats what people want to say, then they can keep it to themselves but don't lie to others because you dont know what else to say. Basically, if you dont know what to say, dont say anything at all. It's better than lying.
  4. all people do in chat, including me, is to to reassure you that things WONT be this way forever, we dont claim to be fortune tellers, we are giving an opinion and people here DO genuinely care... people dont tell you bullshit.. they say things will get better, not instantly, it will take a long time. people try to help you and sometimes you wont even listen.. i really hope you dont go through with your plans. no that people are here, and you can pm me ( and proberly anyone else on here) if you ever want to talk.
  5. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    We are hurting too, Viper. It's not just you.

    We have our own troubles too - all of us. That's why we're here. We do our best to help people, and unfortunately, short of actually meeting the person, '' It'll get better '' etc, are all that we can say.

    It may not feel that way to you, because you are to an extent, blinded by the pain and lowness that yo'ure feeling at the moment, but I felt that too-that it never would get better.

    Now, it *is* better, much better in fact. So, why we may be lying from your point of view, some of us actually have experience of it getting better. :)
  6. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    You can't just act like a dick because you think your pain is worse.

    No-one here is going to tell you how to kill yourself, or tell you that you should. We all have to deal with that. Google's available. For goodness sakes.

    You can't quantify your pain against other people's.
  7. Panther

    Panther Well-Known Member

    I tried to reply to this post before but couldn't, anyway, I'll try and remember what I was typing before.

    There is no way people are here are fake. Why do you think it is that when people are going over the edge that people rally round and even sometimes call an ambulance?

    I don't know many people on here but I know that good friendships have been formed, where people can relate to others and genuinely care.

    I'm not going to tell you things will get better, I really don't know. When my Mum told me things would get better there's no way I believed her. And I can't say I know how you feel. I went through hell on earth last year but your feelings and situation may be different.

    That's about all I wanna say for now. I hope you continue posting.
  8. Evo_L

    Evo_L Well-Known Member

    Thing about being very depressed is that it can often get better, there's been millions of people who've ended up in dire positions who've struggled through really dire shit and come out on top, because they've stayed comitted to finding a solution.

    If you're really sure there's no hope at all you would never even post in a place like this unless to give good-byes.
  9. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    I'm not sure if you saw my post on how to help others, but one of the points was make sure you tell the other person the truth, give good honest support.

    I don't expect people lie about things getting better, that is their opinion that it will get better because that's what they believe. If you refuse to believe that and want to believe that it constantly stays bad forever, that's your choice, and your opinion. But don't tell people not to express their opinions.

    No one really knows what happens in the future, not you, nor anyone.

    You could have expressed what you wrote in a less offensive manner and probably it would have been a very good point. Unfortunately, your wording and manner has made it quite an oofensive post in a lot of ways.
  10. Viper

    Viper Well-Known Member

    People do think they are fortune tellers black rose. When somebody says "things will get better" that is not an opinion, it is a claim. When people claim this, I'm simply saying that they have no way of knowing and for those that they tell, it may only lead to dissapointment and thus more pain, so why say it?

    I know people are hurting Abacus and I'm certainly not the only one. I never said I was. I don't think my pain is worse. Why are you putting words in my mouth? I'm only saying that there are some that don't know what it's like having nothing to look forward to, and some that do. I haven't quantified anything. I dont really think pain can be quantified.

    I don't think everyboy here is fake. I said that there are some that are. They say things over and over again no matter who they are talking to. Theres nothing personal about what they say because it could be anyone. If somebody were to say "I love you" to everybody in the world, then it would have no meaning. Meaning can only be given to things because there is a lack for other things.

    What I said did not apply to the people who actually pay attention to other peoples problems and give them real advice instead of the saying the same thing over and over again to others because they have nothing else better to say and feel that it's what they should say instead of what they want to. Again, that only applies to people who do feel that they think about what they should say, instead of saying how they feel about somebody elses situation.
  11. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    - - - - - - - - - - - -

  12. run4fun

    run4fun Well-Known Member

    i appreciate your apology. i don't remember reading any of your posts.

    this forum is not an all encompassing. it won't be like seeing a shrink. i went to a shrink who's only help was in academics. i could tell he had no idea what i was feeling. if he did he probably wouldn't be able to handle the sessions. this forum is the only way to meet fellow suicide involved people on an anonymous and unbiased setting. i like to reach out to people over the world to share ideas where we have a common experience. i only expect a little from this forum. don't expect this forum to encompass everything.
  13. Viper

    Viper Well-Known Member

    Nobody, I hope you don't think I am contradicting myself. If it wasn't clear enough, I'm saying there are two types of people. Those that are in constant pain, and those that aren't. I am one that is in constant pain. I am not the only one in constant pain. I don't see why you think I've contradicted myself.

    Also, I was reviewing some posts and I found what I was looking for. These are the types of posts that are actually helpful:

    "I care about you and I hope you feel better soon" - ~Nobody~

    "So try and find a way to believe that you are worth helping. Find a way to get some self belief. I wish I could suggest something, but I don't know. Therapy? Self esteem building?" - Scum

    These are the words that matter. You are not telling somebody that it will get better as if you somehow know them better than they know themselves. All I'm saying is that I would like people to act like this more often.
  14. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    :dance: I was so scared that you thought I was fake or a liar or whatever. hopefully others see what I say as helpful too.

    However (and this is by no means a reflection on Nobody because I can't see anything wrong with what he writes) but Viper, you said

    and yet said

    You said that Nobody's post was helpful, despite it saying that he cares. I'm a bit confused as to what your real view on this is, because you do appear to contradict yourself.

    (Nobody, I hope you understand that I see nothing wrong with what you have said, people often like to know that people care, etc, I am merely questioning what Viper thinks about it, that's all)
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 17, 2007
  15. Viper

    Viper Well-Known Member

    Basically, when I said "The ones that say this are the ones that aren't in pain." The 'this' refers to the thing about fortune telling stuff. Like how things will get better or something. I like how nobody worded it because he was basically saying "I hope things get better". This makes complete sense and I believe it. It's different to say "things will get better" as if you know that. I also don't think that nobody hear cares about anybody.

    I wasn't talking directly to you scum or anybody else. The ones that say to themselves "hmmm, I dont know what to say to this person, so I will say this because it just sounds good and they will probably believe it" are the ones i'm talking about. I dont mean that when anybody says something that sounds good is not being sincere, but that if you don't mean what you say then dont say it.

    I gave some examples of things I like to see on this forum. Now let me show you what needs to stop:

    "Just hang on buddy, things will get better. I promise."

    I'm not going to say who said this, but this kinda shit doesn't do anything. Even without the I promise, it is still bullshit. I actually couldn't believe that somebody promised this. This statement is not supportive and it has a negative impact in my point of view. I hope everyone can understand what I'm talking about.
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 17, 2007
  16. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    She :)

    (and I agree with Scum)

  17. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    I see what you are saying Viper, but people aren't trying to be fake or to lie. I agree that nobody can know for sure whether or not things will get better. They can only go based on their own experiences and so they sometimes tend to generalise things. Like you said, sometimes people just do not know what to say, and are hoping that a few words of encouragement and kindness will at least let that person know that someone is thinking of them and that they matter. I can see how you think it may be disingenuous, but at least they are trying to help. I guess everybody knows now that that sort of thing doesn't work for you :) But for others, it may be helpful.

    BTW Viper, things may or may not get better, and I hope you choose to hang in here and find out :wiggle:
  18. ~Nobody~

    ~Nobody~ Well-Known Member

    I am a she.

    Thank you Carolyn for pointing that out :hug:.

    On that note it does sort of worry me that you and I have actually talked on several occasions and yet you think I'm a guy.

    Oh well.

    Says a lot.

    But yeah. It;s a girl who's killing herself today. At least you dfidn't know me that well.

    You don't think I care about anybody?
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 18, 2007
  19. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Sorry, it was a simple mistake.

    If I'm honest, I don't even remember writing that post last night.

    I apologise for any offence my stupidity caused.

    Look after yourself
  20. Viper

    Viper Well-Known Member

    Exactly my point. People don't even pay attention to each other. They just say "ya, sure, uh uh, ok well get better"

    I hope you can stay with us tho Nobody. I think you are a valued part to this forum and I'd like to get to know you. I know I've seen you in chat and if I ever go back there and you are there, you can bet I'd like to talk to you. Although I honestly don't know how much I'll be around here anymore myself.

    Oh and Nobody, I meant nobody people not ~Nobody~ you. And I was saying that not everyone pretends to care and that there are those that actualy do.
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