Philosophical Dead-End

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Prox, May 14, 2012.

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  1. Prox

    Prox Active Member

    I'm not depressed. If I am, the depression is very, very mild. I get into bad moods and feel bad when bad things happen, but that's not a major problem for me. I don't have any real psychological problem at all — at least not in any sense codified in the DSM-IV. I do, however, have a major deficiency I'm stuck on two philosophical questions. I study philosophy a lot, you see — it's a bit hobby of mine.

    But the two philosophical questions that most torture me are 1) What's the meaning of life (what's the point of it)? and 2) What should I do?

    I can't seem to establish a good reason to care, or do anything. I do care, of course. Everyone cares — it's a psychological fact. But desires, worries, and all — those are just facts. They don't provide any reason to do anything, they are just reasons why things get done.

    But once I realize that fact — that what I want doesn't necessarily mean anything about what I should do — I lose all direction. Sure, my life will have direction in the sense that everything I do will follow an orderly path toward some goal, but that direction will be senseless, meaningless. I become a biological robot, programmed to act in a certain way by a force without any meaningful purpose of its own.

    That force might be evolution or God or even the Easter Bunny, but none of these forces provide any reason to care about what I'm doing. They just render it a scientific fact that I do care and leave me alone to interpret that. Want is all there is, the only source of motivation that makes sense, but it is, in itself, senseless. There's no point!

    Consider all of the things we value intrinsically, that we want even if they result in nothing else — like happiness, honor, the welfare of our loved ones. Isn't saying that those things are intrinsically valuable the same as saying that we value them for no reason? The same as saying that our values are hollow, groundless, and essentially pointless? Happiness is great, there's no doubt about it. But it is meaningless. The happy life, all else equal, isn't any more meaningful than the crappy one. Nothing about either suggests that something has happened that matters.

    As a human being, I care, but as someone observing myself, as an evaluator, I see something much more tragic:
    I'm putting so much effort and emotional investment into something, even suffering for it...
    But nothing I'm doing makes sense! There's not one goal I can conjure up that matters!

    This is why I think of suicide. Not because life is so hard to push through, but because I don't see any reason not to skip to the ending of all this pointless tedium. Caring is exhausting! In the end, I just want some sleep.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 14, 2012
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Apathy is an indication of depression,although no one can even attempt to diagnose anyone on cyber...maybe, speaking to someone IRL and discussing your experiences would be helpful...often times, it is not the mood we experience, it is how long they persist , what is going on (the context) and how proportional they are to the experiences...although, I am one who laughs at funerals, so I know there is a wide range of behaviors one can exhibit...sorry nothing you are doing makes sense...I have had those times in my life...completed chaos with seemingly no direction...for me, those were the times I had to change course, but it was so difficult...keep exploring and advocating for yourself
  3. anotherearthplease27

    anotherearthplease27 Well-Known Member

    you know i've always wondered if that is the whole problem with humanity...we always feel like things have to have a purpose

    does the color green have to have purpose...does the ocean have to have purpose and justify itself? just are and we accept it...why can't we accept and respect ourselves?
  4. Brokengirl123

    Brokengirl123 Well-Known Member

    Existential crisis...? There are usually other things at work beneath this from what I have read. Depression is one of them. I don't think depression is all about just feeling sad either.

    Maybe you could read up about this topic. It might help you to understand yourself a bit better. I go through these phases too. But I have always found meaning when I have found love.

    I also think anotherearthplease27 makes a very great point above.
  5. bondono

    bondono Member

    If there is no purpose, and I know that there is not, why?

    Why? Insert anything and everything after that. Why care? Why work? Why struggle?

    Why not live a life of hedonism until You get hit with the repercussions, and then just kill yourself?

    Why make such a fuss when someone is tired of existance and decides to bring it to an end?
  6. Prox

    Prox Active Member

    I'm not depressed. Trust me — I study psych even more than I do philosophy. Depression simply doesn't characterize how I feel. One symptom is not enough for a diagnosis.

    This does nothing to explain why I should do anything. If you're implying that I should just forget the meaningless of it all and live, you have to explain why. What makes one decision better than any other? What makes things matter such that they are a "whole problem"?
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