Hi, I am too poorly to leave the house because I'm physically ill with an illness I've had for 3 years now. That's the only reason I want to die because I don't like being stuck at home at an age (17) when everyone is out having fun, making money, getting girl friends and learning. I'm becoming more and more angry when I do go out and see people with friends walking/running about, having fun. I'm learning to drive as sort, but 2 months ago I canceled my lessons because it made me ill and now I just drive with my mum. I don't care to do the test, I just want to get out of the house. I suppose one day I could run someone down with their health... would be sort of an added bonus. Anyway, I'm pretty lonely and I don't know what to do. I'm too poorly to get a job and I stopped education. A lot of people here read books so I've started it too and now I'm reading a book about dinosaurs. I've also started reading a book on American history. Partly because it's interesting, but mostly because I'm interested in where my ancestors came from. Genealogy is normally associated with elderly people and for a 17 year old to be doing it, oh jesus.