On 9/26/2008 I came home from work to an empty house. My wife, my kids, my dog, my stuff all gone. < Mod Edit - Methods > On other occasions since, I have also combined alcohol and pills, several times since at different levels trying to get the job done. On one succ occasion I really screwed up and afterwards was told that my soon to be exwife never wanted to speak to me again. That put me over the edge. I went out the next day, bought a rope, worked thru the weekend (At my part time job) all the while looking for a spot to do the deed. That Sunday night, I drove to the spot, tied the rope around the spot, put it around my neck, and thought about my kids. I then spent a week in the asylum. I still have suicidal thoughts now. And even now I am on anti depressents.