Piss On It

[Trying4Life]

I hate winter. I hate Christmas. I hate me. I hate my so-called life.

'Friends' had a Zoom Xmess party. I couldn't access it. I clicked the links, I jumped through the hoops, I prostrated myself in every way the platform said I had to. Nada. Then again, I'm not sure I missed anything. Said friends haven't called me in over a year, nor responded to messages from me. But my spouse tells me I am the asshole for being upset about it.

Nothing like 'togetherness' holidays to make you feel alone. And that in good years. 2020, all bets are off.

Piss on it. If I am lucky I just won't wake up tomorrow. Not that I have any plans.

I have an appointment for treatment Monday morning, but I can't say that that gives me any hope.

Not being a social creature, I'm not sure why I am bothering to post here. I don't do social networking. I will post this and maybe feel better for venting, but I probably won't check back for another week, give or take.

Oh well. Piss on it. "To sleep, perchance to dream..." Tomorrow is another day. Goddammit. Another one, just like the other ones. Yay.

"You're nobody 'til somebody loves you"

Good night. "Sleep, sweet prince."

 

[Autumn1973]

I never feel more alone than I do during the holidays. It sucks, I know. Hope venting made you feel better.

 

[KindaOtiose]

I'm sorry you're feeling so bad at the moment @Trying4Life. Holidays can be tough for a lot of people - it can increase the sense of isolation and loneliness a lot of people will feel.

It's understandable that you would be upset if your friends aren't reciprocating the effort you put into socialising or contacting them, and I certainly don't think that makes you an "asshole".

Not being a social creature, I'm not sure why I am bothering to post here. I don't do social networking. I will post this and maybe feel better for venting, but I probably won't check back for another week, give or take.

That's okay, sometimes venting can make us feel better.

I hope you can feel a bit better soon. Sending hugs .

 

[may71]

Sorry that you're going through this

I couldn't access it. I clicked the links, I jumped through the hoops, I prostrated myself in every way the platform said I had to. Nada

I've had trouble with Zoom too. There are a variety of technical issues, like cookie settings, that could be the problem.

Anyway, I'm sorry you missed the Zoom.

Hugs

 

[MosesY]

This is a great place to vent, just to put it out there. I know there is nothing I can say that will make Christmas better for you. I hope you come back here and keep talking.