please dont make me stay i just want to go

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by chrism67, Mar 1, 2012.

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  1. chrism67

    chrism67 Well-Known Member

    The only reason im still here is because of the kids. I dont want to be here. Everday is a struggle to just be here. Today my daughter told me that everything is my fault and that she hates her life. she hates all the people in her life and its all my fault. Right now i am dealing with so much that people that are healthy dont know how im doing it. All anyone knows about is that i have depression. I cut on a daily basis and its getting deeper and deeper. If my kids dont even care about me there is absolutely no reason for me to be here. For the last six months every aspect of my life has had major changes.
    None of which are my doing. Ive had a plan for the last two years. theres nothing stopping me now. I cant do this anymore. Please dont make me stay.
  2. chrism67

    chrism67 Well-Known Member

    By the responses i see how much i impact anybody . Thanks for showing me how much ill be missed. The hell. With it all. I already started cutting today. Y stop
  3. bono

    bono Well-Known Member

    Why cut anyways? Its pointless, and most harmless.
    I have 4 brothers and sisters who are unhappy with there lives to various degrees. 3 of those 4 blame parents and verbally let them know that they are the cause. Of course they still like or even love my parents, they just need someone else to blame for there unhappiness because they can't accept responsiblity for there own lives. They have the most control of there own lives, its part of growing to learn to accept that responsibity.

    I believe my parents are responsible for a solid portion of my unhappiness. But I don't vent on them because I don't like the them or anyone in my family. I can't be bothered to call them only speaking to them every other month, if they call me.

    Personally modern society is largely to blame. They sell everyone on happiness being tied to financial wellbeing. When all the study show finance is way overated. Poverty can make you sad, but wealth won't make you happy. Its your social wellbeing that will by far have the biggest impact on your happiness. Society today is ....fuck to lazy to finish this thought.
  4. LincolnToon

    LincolnToon Member

    Chrism67, I have cut myself on so many occasions over the last 25 years. It did nothing but make me feel ashamed and embarrassed to be honest. At times I felt it was right; I have major demons like you and every day is a struggle, but I will not give up. Please remember that your children will be dealing with heightened emotions due to their hormones. Everything is black and white to them, shades of grey do not come into it. Your daughter's comment to you is something that she I am sure does not mean in the long run.
  5. chrism67

    chrism67 Well-Known Member

    Im reason to stay around. Just dont care anymore.
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