Please get me away from here...

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Yiouka, Nov 13, 2011.

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  1. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    Please get me away from here... I really don't want to live anymore... I don't know what to do... People hate me, people are calling me names... I can't handle this life of mine anymore...
     
  2. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Why are people calling you names?
     
  3. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    Some "friends" found out my selfharming... Now they call me an emo... Some people found out me being pregnant... Now they call me a slut without knowing I was raped...
     
  4. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    I am sorry.
    Those who call you emo are idiots and not worth listening to. Easy to say, but in 10 years will it matter what they thought?
    Those who call you a slut are nasty and more importantly basing their abuse on a false premise. YOu did not get pregnant through consensual sex. Can you let them know?
     
  5. flyingdutchmen

    flyingdutchmen Well-Known Member

    Hi Yiouka
    Im realy sorry for what happend to you. I have read some of your postings and was wondering what was your reason you have decided not to report your assaulter to the police ? I know it will not change your circumstances nor will it undo anything that happend but i find it unfair you are being the one that is blamed for the things you discribe while nobody is aware of what realy happend to you and who is responsible for all this. Is there a reason you choose not to let others know what happend and how you turned turned pregnant ? Pls stop blaming yourself there is nothing you could have done to prevent this but you can make a choice to make life for the one responsible for this a bit harder. Also, you said you will give birth around march/april which would mean you are about 5 months into pregnancy now if im correct, your belly will grow rapidly within a few weeks and if people are not aware of what has happend to you they might raise even more eyes once you dicide to give up your child up for adoption after giving birth, are you not afraid this might make life even harder on you ?
     
  6. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    @windlepoons: I know I shouldn't listen to them but it's hard... They are always saying things like that and I am still not used to it. And it is hard to tell them what happened because no one listens to me.

    @flyingdutchmen: the reason why I haven't report him is that he was one of my best friends. And i know he was already trying to solve some of his problems. If he would get in jail I would ruin his life too. I don't want that.. And why I haven't told anyone exactly what happened? I know that those people don't want to listen. And I they do I'm scared.. When I told my aunt she was so mad at me that she started yelling at me and hitting and I don't want that to happen again.. I'm scared of everyone now...
    My baby will come in april or may so it will tale a while but people are staring already. I'm not going outside the house very often anymore. Most of the time I'm just staying at home. And when I gave birth, that is the time of the final exams on school so after that I will not see most of them anymore. That is really a relief.
     
  7. flyingdutchmen

    flyingdutchmen Well-Known Member

    Do you live at home with your parents ? If so, how do they react to your situation, are they supportive ? Do you have family and/or some good friends you can talk to or are you on your own ? Im sorry to hear about your aunt's awfull reaction, it does make me kinda mad
     
  8. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    I just want to hug you, Yiouka :( I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time. You don't deserve it! I want you to get a little piece of paper and pen... I'll wait... ... ... ... ... ... ... Ready? Now I want you to write this down:

    "Just because someone calls me a mean name, doesn't mean that I AM what they call me. If I call someone a unicorn or a fly fisherman or a hippopotumus, that does not make them what I call them. This same rule also applies to others.

    What I REALLY am: ..."

    Then I want you to write down ALL of your many wonderful qualities (and you have many). Leave room to add more as they occur to you. If you are so down that you can't think of any, go to your most loving, trusted, REAL friend and ask them. Once you have a good list, fold it up and take it everywhere you go. Take it out whenever you need it.

    I too wish that you realized that you are not the one who deserves to be punished for your so-called friend's actions. But if this doesn't seem possible for you right now, I hope you'll be kind to yourself and separate yourself as much as possible from those whose lives are so small and ugly that they have to project their own insecurities onto you.

    Sending love and comforting energy... :console:
     
  9. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    I live with my mom now, her reaction was the same aa my aunt's... I don't really have anyone to talk to. That's why I signed up here.


    Thank you for your help <3 I succeed writing the first one... The second one is hard though... I don't see anything good at the moment, I'm sorry... I don't have a friend here, but once I've found one I will ask them to write something :)
    Well, I know I deserve it, but maybe I'll change my mind in a while...
    Thanks though for all your help!
     
  10. flyingdutchmen

    flyingdutchmen Well-Known Member

    Sorry about that. Like you i am also Dutch, if you ever like to chat in your own language hit me up, i have plenty of time :)
     
  11. ExtraSoap

    ExtraSoap Well-Known Member

    you should report that, what he did to you is inexcusable and utterly sick. His life would get ruined, yes, but he deserves it and he brought it upon himself.
     
  12. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    How are you doing today, Yiouka? I was worrying about you last night! I don't really sleep, so nighttime worrying is sort of a "hobby"...lol. I'm an old lady now (40 seemed impossibly ancient to me at your age), but I remember all too well how hard it was to be a depressed teenager. Just wanted to check in and let you know that you DO have friends here in the forums. We think you're amazing, and we want you to survive 'cause the universe has grand plans for you, young lady. I hope you have a better day today, and don't forget to add to that list. If you haven't thought of anything, you can add "AMAZING"... ... ... (I'm waiting!) ... ... ... Good! ((hugs))
     
  13. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    I don't know if he deserves it.. I'll think about it, maybe I'll report him, I'm just not ready for it right now..

    I'm okay, can be better, but ok. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine, if not, then just not. There's nothing to do about my feelings right now I think.
    Thank you so much for your understanding though. And thank you for mentioning I have friends here on the forum. I really appreciate you all having time for me.
    :) I will add some things on my list, maybe I can post it somewhere on the forum, so you can see that I am really working on it!
     
  14. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    That would be awesome, Yiouka! As we all get to know you better, I'm sure we'll all have qualities to add to it for you. Hang in there, Sweetie! We're all pulling for you. :console:
     
  15. BK_Jetsfan

    BK_Jetsfan Well-Known Member

    You are among friends here. Many of us are self-harmers (I cut, though I'm trying to stop). So you wont be called emo here. The rape is HORRIFIC, but fuck judgmental people. You'll be a mom soon, though by terrible means, and that child will never call you a slut or judge you like that.
     
  16. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    Haha thank you :) I just have to find a place to post it. I don't know where though... Ant suggestions?


    Yes it gived me a good feeling that I'm not the only one who's a self-harmer here... Yeah well hopefully my child will forgive me...
     
  17. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    How about the "Positive Feelings and Motivational Messages" section (under the heading "The Gathering"?
     
  18. Yiouka

    Yiouka Active Member

    Yes that is a great place! I have to go to school in a while but aftrr that I will post it. Thank you!
     
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