Hey all! Thank you so much for clicking this thread that I made. Today has not been a good day for me, I've struggled so hard to study. I can't concentrate on studying, making me more anxious about the future. It seems like my life in an endless roller coaster of feeling motivated and depressed. But... I still want to live. I know that a normal human being doesn't want to do something that harm themselves, it against a basic biological response. At that moment I realize, maybe it's not me that thinking about suicide... it's the other "me". I've been through numerous debates and fights with my other side of me. I can't tell the difference between guilt from normal side like every other person feel, or just guilt for my other side... the one that always ruins my life. I can't tell the difference if the person is actually mad or just joking around. I can't tell the difference between real hate from someone or false hate that has been made by my anxiety. I just can't, I feel so blind and weak. I feel like I had to choose to be a jerk that doesn't care about anything at all or to be a sensitive guy that always care about everything. I'm so confused right now, I can't think straight. Thank you for reading. Can you give your opinion or advice to help me out? Love you guys, have a great day!