I am a 35 year old female and have been married for 17 years. I suffer from bipolar disorder and it has been hard on my marriage. On July 5th I found a text on my husband phone from a women, he tried to say it was nothing but after further questioning he admitted it had been going on since Feb. and he thought he was in love with her. I told him to either end it or our marriage he choose to leave to be with her. On July 6th he came home after she asked him to leave on july 7th I was admitted to a psychiatric facility I was released on July 11th I had to take a taxi home and then he left that night. We have four kids 17,13,8,and 6. My 13 year old is a type 1 diabetic and my 8 year old has autism. He has not seen his kids once since he left. I have no support and am doing everything on my own, I have not worked for over 10 years since my daughter was diagnosed with diabetes, he said it would be cheaper for me to just stay home. So now I am left to pick up all pieces he left and deal with my own mental problems. I have filed for divorce which he is taking no part of so I am doing that all on my own to. I don't think I can take it anymore and more and more I am alone when they are at school and more and more I am getting ready to end it all. I have already written my goodbye letters and have my plan ready. I just don't see any hope in hanging in there any longer. I asked him to stay with the kids so I can go back into the hospital but he told me fine but as soon as he got here he would pack up and take the kids back to Colorado and I would never see them again. I don't have any where to turn ! Please can someone help me to find a way to keep going?