If someone here says... "Don't kill yourself, Spencer," then I won't. I just want to hear one person tell me that I deserve to be alive just because. Not for any reason. I know there is so much love here that we tell people all the time to stick it out even when we don't know them. Someone here just tell me not to do it :heart: I am so depressed. My heart aches like I never thought possible. I am in an absolute hell 24/7. My therapist won't call me back, and I don't have a psychiatrist. All this was supposed to be set up when I was an inpatient in the hospital but they didn't do anything other than put me on old meds that didn't work. I used to frequent this forum a year or two ago. I was here like every day. Clearly what I have tried has not worked. I am so lost, and just want to end this horrible suffering. But I suppose if even one stranger thinks I'm not better off dead then I will not do it! I just need to hear it! That's all!