Why the hell am I letting that upset me so much? I'm sitting here biting back tears over something that really shouldn't matter to me, but for some reason it felt like a massive kick in the teeth. I've got so much to do today but all I wanna do is shut myself away inside and cry all day. I just wish there was someone here who wouldn't mind if I was crying and not being 100% perfect for a while, who'd just give me a hug and tell me I don't have to worry. Someone who I didn't have to be strong in front of all the time for fear that if I'm weak just for a second they'll leave. I had learnt to trust people again and then in one moment it was shattered. It's been 10 months since then and I still can't trust anybody, the thought of being even a tiny bit vulnerable makes me feel sick. I just want to be happy, just a little bit of hope please. I try so damn hard even though I want to just break and have somebody deal with all the shit, but I don't I carry on and nothing ever gets any better. I can't take this anymore, something has got to give.