please please help me

[meh__]

im in such a desperate situation right now and i honestly dont know what to do. all i can do is cry and cry.. a few days ago i was basically "f ucked then dumped" and that just triggered so many awful memories and brought me into such a horrible depression. my birthday is tomorrow and im planning on going through with my final act because i truely feel there is no hope.

i have to see my counsellour tomorrow to discuss details about my molestation and that makes me honestly want to rip out my fu cking intestines and slit my throat at the same time. i have never felt this bad before i honeslty want to die sooo bad its the only wish i have.. like if i had a god i would just pray to him to kill me .. all i want is some form of relief please please help me please.. all ive been doing is crying and smoking weed and i know im gunna hhave to deal with all this shit soonbut im SO f ucking alone and so messed up.. i have NOBODY and i hate it.. i just want to die so bad please please please if there is a god you will kill me please i beg of you.

i dont know what to do i just really need someone right now ... please..

 

[lost in space]

Hi meh_, I'm more than happy to listen if you want to talk.

 

[meh__]

thank you so much, i just need to know that i will be okay.. i dont know how im going to survive tomorrrow. i really really really really want to die so badly i dont even know what to do. everything has come crashing down on me at once and i have no one.

i just want to forget everything and start over a new life.. i dont want to live anymore.. i have no purpose, sure there are some people who care but honestly i feel as though im completely different from everyone around me and no one could ever relate to how i am

 

[lost in space]

Is it the appointment with your counselor tomorrow that you're dreading so much?

 

[sunshinesunny]

r u male?

 

[lost in space]

sunshinesunny...I don't understand why you ask the question...are you male?

 

[waterbearer85]

I hope your appointment goes/went well.

I as well am here to listen, write and support however i can.

 

[Jodi]

Meh,


I do hope things go ok for you tommorow, and please know that we are here for you to help you through. Please feel free to lean on us and let us support you. Let us know how you make out......-Jodi

 

[shady9000]

maybe i already posted in here, but how long were u with the guy?

 

[meh__]

the appointment went okay, i had to meet with another woman about joining a group for survivors of sexual abuse so that was kind of hard on me because i hate remembering scenes from it..

and i was only with the guy a little while but of course i fell for his sweet talking and lies and believed he really was genuine..

 

[waterbearer85]

I'm glad to hear the appointment went ok.


One thing at a time,.... support is always available when you need it.

 

[lost in space]

Same here, I'm glad to hear that things went ok.