I just realized that all I'll ever be able to do to help others on this site is post a hug. I have no words to comfort or advise. Because I can relate to what they've written, and I want to ask them questions. Someone mentions a method to end their life in their post, and I want to ask how they plan on going through with it because I might decide it's better than what I have planned. This is all I am and all I'll ever be from here on out. I'm useless. I read the articles that others have written to try and help those in need, but none of it can be applied to me. Because I have no goodbye notes to write. Not a single one. How pathetic is that? I've never made any real meaningful connections with anyone. I don't know how. I've always been shy, introverted, and I have tried, but it never works out. Every time I think I'm getting close to something good, it ends. It just ends. I don't feel anything anymore. Maybe I'm no longer able to feel. The only regrets I have now is for trying. Attempting to do things I never should've allowed myself to even fantasize about. Like being in a loving relationship with someone. Or having friends. Having reasons to live.
I say this now with full conviction and no regrets or any feelings whatsoever. I want to die. More than anything else I've ever wanted, I want to be dead. I wish I was dead. I wish I had killed myself when I was a teenager. I can't handle this anymore. I just want it to end.
I say this now with full conviction and no regrets or any feelings whatsoever. I want to die. More than anything else I've ever wanted, I want to be dead. I wish I was dead. I wish I had killed myself when I was a teenager. I can't handle this anymore. I just want it to end.