Please Read - Your life CAN change

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by music, Jun 9, 2008.

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  1. music

    music Well-Known Member

    For nearly 23 years I had been a mess. Suicidal feelings every day, horrible loneliness, and generally hated life. I questioned why I was put here to feel such pain and anger all the time. I made a promise to myself that if things didn't change by my 23rd birthday I would kill myself. I gave myself time, as I am normally a fairly rational person and gave other's advice the benefit of the doubt. The day before my birthday I got my gun and did practice empty shots to get used to the feeling of pulling the trigger. I was ready...I had my mind set. Some friends of mine dragged me out of my house and forced me to have some fun on my birthday. That night the girl of my dreams called me. It was like magic or fate....I've never felt so...amazing. We are absolutely insane for each other and couldn't be happier.

    Please Please Please if you plan on harming or eliminating yourself please reconsider and at the very least give it time. You really have no idea what is around the next corner of life. It can be like a light switch that goes from pitch black to brilliant. There is hope...and I really never thought I would have made it to today, but now I can't imagine not being here.

    I wish all of you the absolute best and want to thank everyone who has given me support and pmed when I was most down. Thanks to everyone in the chat room for giving me a good laugh from time to time.

  2. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    And for those of us who's happiness isn't dependent on a partners?
  3. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    hey music, i am so glad to hear that things are looking up for you. she sounds great. congrats! c.
  4. music

    music Well-Known Member

    Ivan, I don't have answers for you, I'm just saying life can change for you when you least suspect it.
  5. Kimi

    Kimi Well-Known Member

    I'm so happy for you. Sending you a lot of best of luck!!
  6. ItThing

    ItThing Well-Known Member

    Ivan! That isn't the point. The point is that even when you are down and have lost hope things can happen that make your life better.
  7. Issaccs

    Issaccs Well-Known Member

    I'm not convinced, I've heard the same crap since I was twelve and the idealistic tripe hasn't shown any follow through yet.
  8. PaintedCanvas

    PaintedCanvas Active Member

    My 23rd birthday is on the 8th July and I will be dead by then. I've just obtained the last ingrediant to a well know leathal cocktail of drugs. You say you were taken out by your friends, well thats very nice for you, I have no friends! I hope my plans don't fall apart like yours did.
  9. music

    music Well-Known Member

    Last weekend we broke up....after so so many years of happiness. My life feels ruined. I am a mess once again. Everything just felt so perfect and now nothing.

    I've grown so much over the years, but this last week... Wow, I feel like I've experienced my whole lifetime. I stand by my original post in this thread. Your life can change and your perspective can change. I thought about ending it a lot and considering I was so incredibly depressed before meeting her. There is more to life than a partner. There is happiness in yourself. Do I still suffer from severe depression? Absolutely. You are still a person with value and you owe it to yourself to give it your all, even through the pain. LIVE life for you and never look back.
  10. USExpat

    USExpat Member

    I wish there were a site like this restricted to people over 30.
  11. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    There is a antiquities forum here for the over 30 if you would like to post there however your tone implies you believe thatyou are somehow excluded from this thread due to it being directed at younger or less mature. Based on your age in a previous thread many of us here might say the same in reference to 40 and there are plenty of 60 and even 70 as well.
    The message still applies equally of things can change.
  12. Twocky61

    Twocky61 Banned Member

    :cheer2: Music :hug: :hug:

    You are an inspiration to us all. It just goes to show none of us knows what the future holds for us. I'm happy for you

  13. Husky

    Husky Well-Known Member

    Hi Music, I would like to commend you on your resilience. Thank you for your motivational comments about not giving up and promoting the ideology of perseverance because you never know when the tide of the rough waters will turn your way. This is just like you said and even though the relationship has changed, I'm glad you know this and have had the courage to share it. Thank you and I wish you all the best with your future endeavours. Husky
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 21, 2014
  14. lotte

    lotte Well-Known Member

    :hug: music :rainbow: glad something went well for you, what an amazing thing when the harshness of life lets up a bit and things turn around!
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