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Please tell me, am I unstable for changing my path too often?

PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#1
I was skeptical about my choice of major since I was in junior high school. In high school I changed my major once (we have majors in high school. "Maths & Physics" for those who will pursue engineering in university and "experimental science" for kids who will be studying medicine in university.)

So in high school I basically changed my mind from a future doctor to a future (petroleum) engineer. Due to my severe depression @ 18 years old, failed to get in university that year. So I went for English as a university B.A major after a year gap.

Always hated my university major tho. I kept making drastic decisions about my future in my head. Last year I thought of studying law after my B.A, then thought of going back to engineering and IT this time.
Nowadays I have been thinking of taking the SAT exam to study medicine in Turkey .... and almost decided to do it just now. I am unhappy with my life, major, etc. Keep making drastic decision. Am I normal/ stable? What should I do next? My mind changed on a daily basis. Yesterday I thought of literature M.A and now medicine for today.

Pretty sure English literature will not bring me much in future......
 
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PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#2
The problem with medicine is, it will probably be too expensive for my parents to afford. I am past the age for getting the scholarship now. They may barely be able to afford it anyway, but is it worth it if I will be 30 years old by time I graduate from medical school?
 

PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#3
I suppose I am being so weird asking people for their opinions on my life... but god knows, I am so lost and unable to make a mature decision tbh....
 

Daphna

Well-Known Member
#4
I was skeptical about my choice of major since I was in junior high school. In high school I changed my major once (we have majors in high school. "Maths & Physics" for those who will pursue engineering in university and "experimental science" for kids who will be studying medicine in university.)

So in high school I basically changed my mind from a future doctor to a future (petroleum) engineer. Due to my severe depression @ 18 years old, failed to get in university that year. So I went for English as a university B.A major after a year gap.

Always hated my university major tho. I kept making drastic decisions about my future in my head. Last year I thought of studying law after my B.A, then thought of going back to engineering and IT this time.
Nowadays I have been thinking of taking the SAT exam to study medicine in Turkey .... and almost decided to do it just now. I am unhappy with my life, major, etc. Keep making drastic decision. Am I normal/ stable? What should I do next? My mind changed on a daily basis. Yesterday I thought of literature M.A and now medicine for today.

Pretty sure English literature will not bring me much in future......
Yes, your inability to stick with one career choice is unstable. What might help is a simple pros and cons list. Also internal examination how each major could fit in with your passions. Not to mention your stay at the university is costing a large amount of money and will continue to do so while you stay there.
 

sinking_ship

woman overboard
Forum Pro
SF Supporter
#5
I don't think it means you are unstable, I think it just means you haven't figured out what you really want yet. You just need to slow down and think before making big decisions. Does your university have some career counseling you can utilize? They might be able to help you figure out what you might want or how to get there.
 

PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#6
Yes, your inability to stick with one career choice is unstable. What might help is a simple pros and cons list. Also internal examination how each major could fit in with your passions. Not to mention your stay at the university is costing a large amount of money and will continue to do so while you stay there.
For now it's basically costing me nothing. It's a university that belongs to the government. I won't pay for anything except transfer between my hometown and university's city.
For my M.A though, since I would want to study abroad, I will have to pay. And I can't just give up on my studies after B.A graduation cause you know.... I could do way better. Money isn't really the main topic here.
 

PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#7
I don't think it means you are unstable, I think it just means you haven't figured out what you really want yet. You just need to slow down and think before making big decisions. Does your university have some career counseling you can utilize? They might be able to help you figure out what you might want or how to get there.
I have talked to a few counselors in high school... doesn't seem to do much for me idk.... Maybe I just don't like anything? All I think of and worry about is my salary in future.
 

Daphna

Well-Known Member
#8
For now it's basically costing me nothing. It's a university that belongs to the government. I won't pay for anything except transfer between my hometown and university's city.
For my M.A though, since I would want to study abroad, I will have to pay. And I can't just give up on my studies after B.A graduation cause you know.... I could do way better. Money isn't really the main topic here.
If money isn’t the issue. What’s your passion in this life?
 

PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#9
If money isn’t the issue. What’s your passion in this life?
Well I mean money will only be an issue if I study smth expensive like medicine but the length of my studies didnt ever become any longer to be an issue.
My passion? Not sure at all. That's the biggest problem ever. Doubt there would be anything which I enjoy except for dancing/modeling
But I live in a place that girls couldn't enter the entertainment industry except acting. By time I get out? Too old since these people start as teens. So basically I have to choose smth related to academics which... idk what I like.
Sorry if I explained too much.
 
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#10
No, you are not unstable. Most of those I went to school with changed their majors in college (bachelors degrees). And most of those that did, often did so more than once! For instance, I knew a girl in my major who gave up her full-ride scholarship in one area / discipline (chemistry) in order to pursue another (communication). I also had a professor who started out as a chemical engineer, the switched & went on all the way through to pursue his doctorate (PhD) in Comm. What they both had (& these are terribly isolated & in a way bad examples from a broad spectrum standpoint or point of view; so think of them as more of certain or atypical “case-studies,” if you will..;) both would not be what I’d consider “outgoing,” comfortable standing and delivering lectures in front of classrooms (full of students) & could almost be considered downright introverted, or shy ☺️- at least socially, that is, in a crowded room of unfamiliar’s / or strangers—when in fact; or reality, communication majors are thought of stereotypically to be very outgoing/dynamic/engaging, etc. if you hire someone from this field - you’re automatically assuming , in general - or generally speaking, that they can &/or are exceptionally good public speakers (like p.r. Or public relations), that they can write and speak flawlessly well- almost to the point of being able to do it in their sleep (deliver a speech) ; also work well with others (in a group setting or context / situation, board room type, environment). And while I have said al l of that, exhaustively, it was to prove a point. They were not perhaps cut from the comm cloth. They did not fit the mold. Even when done (with school), to me - anyway - they appeared to be a scientist & an engineer at heart... which may or may not have been one reason why they both decided to pursue it as far as they both did (all the way to the end, educationally speaking). Now on to the med school idea. If this is what’s in your heart; & you feel deep down inside that it is ultimately your true calling—I mean, where do you want to be in 10 years (believe me, it goes by faster than you think—whether you’re immersed in studies that are difficult to attain, such as becoming a doctor, or doing nothing but staring at the television screen like a mindless monkey just awaitingtheir next meal—either way, it’s marching on - with or without you. So you’ve got to decide what s best for you. You say you can’t afford it without your parents help, but is there any other way you can still get some assistance? Even if it means not going to a place you’ve decide on already, or in advance? I don’t know if You could ge t a better deal here in the states than there, or somewhere like Turkey (which, for all its beauty & probably wonderful medical facilities, climate & scenery, people etc. ) I’m not sure their reputation is that of one that treats women optimally. But I could be wrong about this. And it could stil l also no doubt be a step above (let s just hope it’s not to the side, as in sidestep—), what or where you’re at, what you’ve got now. Just something to think about & keep in mind. If you are able to secure funding / assistance financially, even if it is in the form of student loans, that you will immediately have to begin paying back upon graduating, then that is what that is. And how it should be thought of, or treated. As an — “investment!” In your life, and your future. . : ) that is my sermon for the day, for not even being of a particular religion, though I do sometimes worship my self; just kidding, that is another matter altogether...;) good luck! ☺👍 🍀 😊
 
#11
Though I know (or so I’d imagine & assume — albeit wit h some extreme naïveté!) that going to a county lke Turkey, may very well be a smoother, more easily accessible or adaptable transition for you. . . Or who knows? Maybe not! I am an idiot— please disregard most of what I say. : )
 

PrincessPure

Well-Known Member
#12
No, you are not unstable. Most of those I went to school with changed their majors in college (bachelors degrees). And most of those that did, often did so more than once! For instance, I knew a girl in my major who gave up her full-ride scholarship in one area / discipline (chemistry) in order to pursue another (communication). I also had a professor who started out as a chemical engineer, the switched & went on all the way through to pursue his doctorate (PhD) in Comm. What they both had (& these are terribly isolated & in a way bad examples from a broad spectrum standpoint or point of view; so think of them as more of certain or atypical “case-studies,” if you will..;) both would not be what I’d consider “outgoing,” comfortable standing and delivering lectures in front of classrooms (full of students) & could almost be considered downright introverted, or shy ☺️- at least socially, that is, in a crowded room of unfamiliar’s / or strangers—when in fact; or reality, communication majors are thought of stereotypically to be very outgoing/dynamic/engaging, etc. if you hire someone from this field - you’re automatically assuming , in general - or generally speaking, that they can &/or are exceptionally good public speakers (like p.r. Or public relations), that they can write and speak flawlessly well- almost to the point of being able to do it in their sleep (deliver a speech) ; also work well with others (in a group setting or context / situation, board room type, environment). And while I have said al l of that, exhaustively, it was to prove a point. They were not perhaps cut from the comm cloth. They did not fit the mold. Even when done (with school), to me - anyway - they appeared to be a scientist & an engineer at heart... which may or may not have been one reason why they both decided to pursue it as far as they both did (all the way to the end, educationally speaking). Now on to the med school idea. If this is what’s in your heart; & you feel deep down inside that it is ultimately your true calling—I mean, where do you want to be in 10 years (believe me, it goes by faster than you think—whether you’re immersed in studies that are difficult to attain, such as becoming a doctor, or doing nothing but staring at the television screen like a mindless monkey just awaitingtheir next meal—either way, it’s marching on - with or without you. So you’ve got to decide what s best for you. You say you can’t afford it without your parents help, but is there any other way you can still get some assistance? Even if it means not going to a place you’ve decide on already, or in advance? I don’t know if You could ge t a better deal here in the states than there, or somewhere like Turkey (which, for all its beauty & probably wonderful medical facilities, climate & scenery, people etc. ) I’m not sure their reputation is that of one that treats women optimally. But I could be wrong about this. And it could stil l also no doubt be a step above (let s just hope it’s not to the side, as in sidestep—), what or where you’re at, what you’ve got now. Just something to think about & keep in mind. If you are able to secure funding / assistance financially, even if it is in the form of student loans, that you will immediately have to begin paying back upon graduating, then that is what that is. And how it should be thought of, or treated. As an — “investment!” In your life, and your future. . : ) that is my sermon for the day, for not even being of a particular religion, though I do sometimes worship my self; just kidding, that is another matter altogether...;) good luck! ☺👍 🍀 😊
As usual I live reading your opinions :D a lot!

Turkey definitely is lackluster when comes to equality or other stuff, it's no 1st world (idk if that's offensive to use, hopefully not. ) but it would be HUGE improvement from where I am living rn. At least I will have personal freedom on stuff I didn't here.

I would always prefer lets say northern Europe. Or even States. But doubt I can find a deal a good as Turkey anywhere? If I study medicine in Turkish it would cost between 200-600 dollars per year, if in English, a bit more but still pretty cheap. Doubt that's possible anywhere else.
And well even this little amount will be difficult to afford by my parents ... cause they have the cheapest currency in the world atm. Not saying this to act like a victim or anything lol. I do consider myself way more privilaged than lots of people. I never faced hardship in life (in terms of not being able to afford needs or wants) , but just recently, this currency became a huge problem and made life way more difficult for us.
 
#13
As usual I live reading your opinions :D a lot!

Turkey definitely is lackluster when comes to equality or other stuff, it's no 1st world (idk if that's offensive to use, hopefully not. ) but it would be HUGE improvement from where I am living rn. At least I will have personal freedom on stuff I didn't here.

I would always prefer lets say northern Europe. Or even States. But doubt I can find a deal a good as Turkey anywhere? If I study medicine in Turkish it would cost between 200-600 dollars per year, if in English, a bit more but still pretty cheap. Doubt that's possible anywhere else.
And well even this little amount will be difficult to afford by my parents ... cause they have the cheapest currency in the world atm. Not saying this to act like a victim or anything lol. I do consider myself way more privilaged than lots of people. I never faced hardship in life (in terms of not being able to afford needs or wants) , but just recently, this currency became a huge problem and made life way more difficult for us.
Thanks 😊 so much, for the very fine compliments!! Ahhh 😌 - yes! I actually know just a little bit about the county from someone who was in medical school there at the time. And well, you know, I can’t recall for sure - or for certain, but I believe her end goal was to end up here (in ‘The States!’) — never been a better time to visit! lol 😂 j/k..;^)_ // but so I was kind of basing my judgment on their values and systems in such, from a couple of her personal stories — which may seem like “small fries,” or “peanuts,” to you! I really don’t know. . . In any case, I know that here - even at the local university in town. I routinely see many students from around the globe working on their Master’s degrees & graduate studies (in fact I’ve worked with quite a few of them in jobs they do on the side - or - not related to their programs). Some, many in fact, have been on the older side / in comparison to someone who was domestic, or started here traditionally, and then went straight on through: (B.A. -/- M.A), I mean some of them might have been in their 30’s for example, and this would not at all be what I would consider out of the ordinary. . . A couple of them, one from Nigeria, and another from Cameron (oh god did I spell right?) maybe there’s two “oo’s!” - I dunno. Sorry buddy! ;D I could use google, but that’s cheating..;) anyway they were two of the smartest, most fun & interesting people You’ll ever come across, and that I got to work with. Once you got around their accents!! ;) I’m totally joking 🙃 & just kidding with you - their English was better than mine, which, though not saying much, and if you feel or fear i am just being kind. Then how about this, “their English was better than my ‘Nigerian,’ & ‘oh crap!’ Camer ya’ know what maroon 5 eon! ;) ...
-& I forgot what N. Europe looks like! I took world regional geography in 8 th grade — (or as a 14 year old, & haven’t bothered to look 👀 much since!) does this include Wngland? Or Great Britain? How about th e United Kingdom? Or “Londonium!” ;^) or are they like Quebec? In that they wish or want to be “separate,” (from Canada / Europe). My vote would be to go to Germany, unless that’s not north enough for ya! ; ) Ireland? Ther e u go! It’s settled☺️😊 (so glad we could have this talk / discussion and get it all worked out for the next phase of your life! ) seriously though, if they were able to help you somehow foot the bill in these trying times / circumstances, you could always make it your mission to pay them back, with interest, if you so choose! ;D but might need to specialize for that, or become a surgeon 👩‍⚕️ I don’t know 🤷‍♂️! ;^)
 

Aurelia

🔶🔸✴ 👑 ✴🔸🔶
#14
That type of thing is a symptom of BPD. Frequent drastic changes implies an unstable sense of identity. But it also depends on whether you have any other symptoms or not.
 
#17
Doubt I would enjoy any... I only think of money
What you get, with this, when you do so in fact choose to devote your time to it. . . (Is EXPERIENCE): & this can be both, “good!” & “bad!” But guess what ? Either way—or every “in-between,” What happens IS you ‘Learn Something!’ (So it’s like an Audition, or sorts. . : ))—& audition for your life! Or career..;) saves a heckuva lot of headache than just gambling or choosing blindly or flipping a coin and going ahead and taking the plunge to invest in a path w/o experience. And depending on what it is — it can sometimes lead to a “job” - where you’re actually earning income, b/c the people that do the hiring get to see you, “in-the-field!” (It’s an audition of sorts, for them, too!) I can’t tell you how many employers I’ve heard rave about this process & how much they love it, because they get to see first hand what kind of person you are, as well as how you work (hard / ethic, etc.) - how does you deal with stress? When things go your way? When they don’t? When you’re tired! And so on & so on & so on. . . & if you don’t happen to like it - then you’ve waste no time at all: (because now you won’t go diving in & attempting to make a life long journey out of it!) z or something like that— @ least at the start! I hope it doesn’t sound like I was “lecturing,” but I suppose it probably does. But the good news is this: through all of that; I have lost you, and you are no longer even paying attention! ;) I could type anything I want & please & there No-thing you can do about it ! A-hahhahahahaaA ; ) j/k
 

tlaud

Well-Known Member
#20
Doubt I would enjoy any... I only think of money
Not trying to critique, but the recommendation for volunteer time spent is pretty good, as it can be very critical in providing experience to avoid the uncertainty of what profession to pursue, which is what this post appears to be all about. I truly hope you listen to what others with experience are sharing. No experience may lead to other problems of unmet expectations, as more goes on behind the scenes in every profession.

And here is a short background, that I earned degrees at ages 30, 33, and 37, but have done the last for 27 years. You seem to have variable options, because if you say you can go to med school, your brain must be pretty good. Best wishes.
 

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