It's been a hell of a year. I've moved to a new city. I split up with the man I thought I would marry. I've had to accept I'll never have children after failed IVF. Just after I moved to the new city, I had an accident and spent 4 months with my leg in plaster, and couldn't get out out my flat much. I was off sick because of it and am still picking up the pieces financially. And today, I got told my job's ending. (It was an agency job but the department manager is making cutbacks, even though my immediate manager wanted to keep me.) It was a job I'd wanted for ages and love it. And to top it all off, I'm really struggling to lose the 2 stone I gained when I was in plaster so want to go back to the laxatives I used to take. I honestly feel like nothing is worth it any more. I'm a loser and everyone would be better off without me. I'm a rubbish person. I've been thinking about ending it all, but I can't even do that cos I'm a coward. I can't tell my boyfriend about this cos he's lost 3 friends to suicide. He'd be so much better off without me though. I just want a 'normal' life and to feel better but I just don't see how it will get better. I'm sorry for rambling. I just have no-one to talk to.