Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by lost_child, Jan 10, 2008.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    I'm feeling suicidal, but know I won't do it as I keep messing up, i don't want my flat mate to find me, last time she was so scared and said if i done it again she would kill me. I can't escape the feelings.

    Please please please can someone help me, please. I've no1 to talk too, please can someone help me. I don't like asking and i'm sorry.
  2. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    Talk to me. I'm a frustrated living being who longs for death.
  3. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    I want to die, i'm tired and scared of life and waiting for it all to happen again. but i don't want to hurt anyone. I've brought pills and blades and they just looking at me. something in my head keeps telling me its the only way.
  4. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    Well I have no family and just a couple friends. I have no job, no career. In fact, I was laid off yesterday, which tells you just how useless I am. Suicide is always in my head, and I feel like a failure for never acting on it. I'm waiting for an excuse, a catalyst to bring about my destruction. At me next job, maybe I'll get violent. Maybe someone will call the cops and I'll make them shoot me.

    This fucking society is set up to destroy you. I've tried to make it, but it's not good enough. I figure I'm gonna have fun and be creative on my road to destruction. I've made up my mind to take my anger out on a number of people. I wanna seriously damage some successful yuppies with their fucking laptops sitting on the train. Then I'll get some CEOs and VIPs. It's fun to think about. Maybe hate is what keeps me going.
  5. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    eeeekkkk I'm sorry. I don't get angry or hate anyone except myself ~ sometimes I wish I could. i'm sorry.

    sorry you was laid off yesterday.
  6. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    What exactly do you hate about yourself?
  7. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    Everything, the way I look, the way I act, the way I dress. How I have no confidence, self esteem gone.

    I hate everything about me, everything about the way I do things, how I react to things, how i'm scared of my own shadow. I hate everything.
  8. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    I have body dysmorphic disorder. If I look in the mirror a lot, it's to remind myself that I look okay, it's not out of narcisstic self love or anything like that. And there are some aspects of my personality that I despise, and I feel they're powerless to change. So it's a lifelong struggle. And it's only getting worse. I feel really out of control. I feel like it's only a matter of time until death comes. I feel so stressed right now.

    Currently I'm pushing all these disturbances aside to make a little heaven for myself. I may have pneumonia right now and I see a doctor tomorrow. I am not going to make an effort to look for a new job. I am just going to take it easy.
  9. Corieh Infected

    Corieh Infected Well-Known Member

    I think a lot of people hate themselves.. I mean, it gives them an excuse to wanna die, right? If you hate yourself bad enough and can't live with yourself, you just think that by dying you'd be doing yourself a favor, and not hurting anyone. So.. I dunno.. Maybe if you could start to think a little bit better about yourself, or try, 'cause I know it's not always possible. But if you could seek out one thing you like about yourself, and concentrate on that and try to improve it, you might start feeling better..
  10. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    You have me lost child. Been rather f*cked up last little while and still am. But I'm here if you still want to talk to me. You too pit. Can tell you what it's like to fail all the time and hate the world. Pm me.
  11. SoulRiser

    SoulRiser Well-Known Member

    That's true, society is really screwed up... what do you mean by "make it" though? Success is different for everyone. I figure if you're managing to stay alive and also do what you really want to with your life (not stuff that other people tell you to do), you're successful. Nobody really needs lots of money and a fancy car and all that crap. The best things in life are free. Also, if you've noticed how fucked up society is, that means you're intelligent, probably more so than most of those "yuppies" you were talking about. Most.
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.