Please...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Matt93, Nov 23, 2010.

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  1. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    Please can someone put a gun to my head and pull the trigger, I feel alone, totally worthless, afraid, cold, I'm still in shock from a blood test, due to hating needles.

    I feel like too much of a wimp to kill myself, but if my mood continues, there's a gun sitting 12 feet away from me, and I can easily grab that and pull the trigger. I just want someone else to do it for me. Please
     
  2. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    Please don't use the gun. Here if you want to talk.
     
  3. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    I'm too weak to do so right now. I want to. I want to, very badly. I just can't even pick myself out of bed.
     
  4. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you're feeling so terrible. Even though we can't be with you physically, we're here for you, you're not alone.

    I hear a lot of desperation in your post, and I know how that feels. Try as hard as you can to distract yourself, take yourself out of this place. I know how much it hurts, but you are stronger than that. Please believe in yourself.

    Mim
     
  5. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    I know that I can do it. I just don't want to any more. I feel as though the good parts of my life have gone out of the window.

    I can't distract myself, I can't leave my house, at 11pm :/
     
  6. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry Matt. I genuinely wish I could be there with you and help you through this.

    I didn't mean to literally take yourself out, I meant mentally, maybe watch TV or read. Anything which will take your mind off things. I know that I find it too easy to fall into despair, but if I make myself read a good book or get stuck into a TV programme, it really does help, at least for a little while.

    Mim
     
  7. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    Hope you're alright m8, don't do it. Shit's hard as a teenager, feels like everything has already unfolded in your life, but I'm sure it hasn't.... I feel you.
     
  8. oval

    oval Well-Known Member

    hey matt
    i was actually feeling the same just two hrs ago. i could barely make myself move all day i couldnt even get a word out, messed up everything possible. the past 6hrs were a pretty bad struggle. i was messaging two people on here and talked to them for a while and it helped me so much. im just feeling relieved. tired but relieved
    it can really help you to talk to us here
    just getting it out and having someone helping you through it
    i really hope your feeling much better soon matt! you can pm me if you wanna talk about it ok?
    eva
     
  9. Matt93

    Matt93 Well-Known Member

    Life shall go on, a gunshot to the head is a drastic and permanent solution, to a problem that can be fixed. One shall survive, or as I have been learning with my differentiation today in Maths... "I WILL DERIVE!" XD
     
  10. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    what is the problem that can be fixed? Can I help any?
     
  11. Autumn01

    Autumn01 Well-Known Member

    You're not alone. I feel the same way.
     
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