Please

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by MoAnamCara, Jan 13, 2012.

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  1. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    I have tried to talk to a crisis line tonight. I am alone. I am scared to try but think for me right now its the best thing to do. I have all my own meds plus someone elses. I just can't deal with this, am freaking out completely. I don't know if I should just mix them all up or take all the pain meds first. i don't know, I don't fucking know. can someone please help
     
  2. Iain

    Iain Well-Known Member

    Dear Mo,
    a couple of weeks ago I was in pretty much the same place. You are not alone. Are you able to ell us what caused the crisis? Please dont make any sudden decisions. And Im sure that other members will see this post and send you their warm positive thoughts.
     
  3. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Mo I know you're under so much pressure right now but please don't end your life..

    I selfishly want you to stay here and I'm sure your "one' needs you now more than ever..
    these thoughts do usually pass and i hope you can hold on until they do..
    you are such an amazing person and with our support I hope you will get through this crisis ((hugs))
     
  4. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Please just write more, tell us or me all your fears, get it all out.
    I know your situation is awful, your burdens are heavy but nobody here expects you to deal with them alone.

    Can you at least keep talking to crisis team?
     
  5. clairedelune

    clairedelune Well-Known Member

    Hi! Please calm down and try to breathe in and out. Why don't you try something you've never done before? Like, going outside and taking in the beauty of the world. There's so much to do in order to kill the pain you're feeling. I completely understand how you feel and I have nothing else to do but be there for you. A lot of people are here for you. We care and I hope you'll finally realize that you're always worth it. *hugs*
     
  6. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Thank you all - I a fine. It was a bad night but at some point I finally let go and sat and cried for an hour which helped release some of what was built up inside of me. :grouphug:
     
  7. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    That is good to hear Mo. Please keep talking to us.
     
  8. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Hi Mo,

    I am so glad you were able to pull through last night....and also that you are here getting the support you deserve. Way to go! I hope your circumstances improve soon....keep writing! :hug:

    Alex
     
  9. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    :hug:
     
  10. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Today I went through the meds in the house. If I were to guess theres a couple of hundred at least. I've kept the no longer used meds from my so, I think some type of security blanket in some obscure way.

    Tonight when outside my foot slipped on some icy steps. At first I corrected myself and moved to a non-icy space. Then I looked down to what could be an escape.

    When I realized what I was thinking I just shrugged. Shouldn't my response be one of more concern or am I becoming indifferent to my thoughts? Isn't indifference the worse thing to (not) feel, the most dangerous?
     
  11. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    We can adapt to almost anything I think.
    I am sorry these thoughts have become something you have grown so used to.

    Can you put the meds somewhere where you have to work to get them, in a box marked with something that will give you pause, a good memory perhaps?
     
  12. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Windle - thanks for responding. Thanks for trying. Thanks for talking with me this last while. But its time you took care of yourself, be good to yourself. You deserve a lot, not my crap.

    No one does actually. I'm sick and tired of myself. So dramatic, time to quit this stuff.

    Obviously I have serious issues myself, so please, kindly ignore.
     
  13. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    not going to ignore you Mo..you mean too much for us to do that..
    not sick or tired of you either..
    keep talking if you want..*hug*
     
  14. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    Its not crap, Mo. And I will not ignore you, obviously, or your 'issues' as you call them. Neither should you. This is your time to need the help and support we can provide, we are all here because we have these periods, there is nothing to feel bad about.
     
  15. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    Oh, ((((((Mo))))))... I'm so incredibly sorry that I missed this post! Please know that you are loved and that you deserve so much more than the difficulties you've had to endure. And know that I care so much, and I am here for you when you need a friend. Thinking of you, Sweet Friend, and wishing you peace. ...T :console:
     
  16. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    I don't think I can do this.
     
  17. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    What can you not do, Mo?
    I hope you can let us help you. You are under so much pressure, and I and I think others would love to help you with your burden.
     
  18. ZasuArt

    ZasuArt Well-Known Member

    Sending love, hugs and postive, healthy energy. I'm here for you, Mo. You're not alone. ...T :console:
     
  19. MoAnamCara

    MoAnamCara SF Artist

    Im anxious, on my own, defeated, angry, sad. Things are overwhelming me, completely.
     
  20. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    You are not defeated, I am sure though you may feel it. I am here if you want to talk about things.
     
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