No, I'm sorry. I think this threads done. I shouldn't have posted it in the first place. I'm sorry about that.
Take care.
Your thread is really valid and is something so many people struggle with so it's a good thing to talk about for everyone here.
So, I take it that you bit the bullet and went to the Doctors. And how did that go for you?
I left it too late. I only spoke to the Doctors when I woke up in the ICU after an attempt. The doctors I've dealt with in the three years since have been empathetic, helpful and caring. I think the worse thing for my family was the shock - as far as they were concerned I was fine and happy, the next thing the police were at the door in the middle of the night telling them I'd been found unconscious 200 miles away and they didn't know if I'd survive.
If you really don't want your family finding out it would be easy to get round that. Make appointments for when you have time alone - husband at work, child at school etc. The likelihood is, if it's just a doctor you're seeing, you'll only need to see them every couple of months. If you decide to try therapy it will be more frequent but there are lots of ways this can be explained away - the main thing is that you get the help you need, not that you tell a white lie with the best of intentions.
You've obviously been managing in your job perfectly well so you didn't lie about any health issues that affect your ability to carry out your job. That may change in the future but they'd have no reason to think you'd lied at the time. You also wouldn't be under any obligation to tell them about it now if it is not affecting your work.