Poorly Built

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by BelovedDreamer, Mar 12, 2012.

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  1. BelovedDreamer

    BelovedDreamer Well-Known Member

    The world is a hard place.
    Can you hear me?
    The world is a hard place
    and I am ill-made to exist in it.
    They built me on an unsteady plane,
    and I have used mostly poorly chosen bricks
    to build the rest.
    Out of something like necessity
    the bricks are mostly hewn of fear,
    and fear is as brittle a material as can be.
    And when it is not brittle
    it is moldable as clay.
    When I do not break
    I bend.
    I fold in fear
    or crack as though every bump were a crisis.
    I am poorly built.
    I could be of worse construction.
    Could be wantonly cruel.
    Could be maliciously destructive.
    Could be a million things.
    But I am myself
    weak where I would be strong
    and though perhaps better than many alternatives,
    I am poorly built
    and the world is hard.
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    BelovedDreamer, wonderful metaphor! I like how your choice of words emphasizes the frailty of your "construction" and how you respond to fear - brittle, moldable, bending, and also that you contrast your construction with things that could be worse. The things that could be worse would likely make you a "harsher" person. I don't think you have been badly built, but perhaps hurt along the way. As you are, you are a kinder, more aware person. :hug:
  3. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    I really enjoyed reading your poem! It's true that some of us are "poorly built" but we can become stronger, and not hardened and cold. You really have a great talent with writing. :smile:
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