Pregnant and Scared

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by dink, Sep 8, 2007.

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  1. dink

    dink Well-Known Member

    I just found out on Thursday that I am pregnant. My head is still spinning. I don't know what to do. My bf is now saying that in his head there is a possibility that he thinks that it may not be his. It is. I have NOT cheated on him. Everyone that I have said anything to keeps telling me that I have options, but I really don't feel as though I do.

    Please help if you can. I am really starting to not feel so safe with myself. I don't want to go to the hospital. I am having to stop my meds...God, I don't know what to do.
  2. -Sunset-

    -Sunset- Well-Known Member

    Hiya, I know you don't know who the hell I am, but anyways. Ask yourself what you really want. Remember, its not just you that you have to think of now.

    It also sounds like your boyfriend is a bit insecure, has he ever had anyone treat him bad for him to be this way? Being insecure is a very difficult thing to deal with, its something that you two (three) have to work out between yourselves. If you try praising him up for the littlest things, tell him you was chatting to a friend who has a really horrible bf and that you are so glad to have found him and to be with him and stuff like that, and if you have a bebo or myspace or something, write lots about him, just make him feel very loved, and he will soon be 100 % again. Once he is better, he will be able to support you a whole lot more, and just generally knowing that he believes that child is his, will make you feel a whole lot better x X x take care x X x
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    This is a difficult position you are in. Yes, you do have options. You need to look into them and decide which is the best for the three of you. I am sorry your bf is doubting you.The two of you need to sit down and work things through. What reasons would he have to doubt you? Is there someone you can talk with to explore your options? What are your thoughts at this point? You don't mention your age or if you are in the position to care for a child. All this must be taken into consideration. If you would like to discuss things you a free to PM me if you feel you need to. I will answer you as soon as I can. Please take care. :hug:
  4. dink

    dink Well-Known Member

    I don't see why I should have to build him up. He knows that I love him. He and I both flirt with people. It is innocent on both parts. There are times when we flirt together. He gets upset with me thinking that I may have cheated on him. He is the one that has been married twice and cheated on both of them. I have told him that I have not cheated on him. It is like I am supposed to just take his word for everything, but he doesn't trust me.

    He is 40 years old and is starting a new job on Monday. He is asking me for money to help him out. He has been unemployed for a few months now, and has spent some of his money on really stupid things...going out to lunch with friends, playing pool, everything except paying his bills. I don't know what to do. He suffers from depression, but won't see anyone or consider meds.

    I will be 33 in October. I am on disability. I currently live alone. I do spend time at his place with him, but recently I have just wanted to stay home in part due to my sick elderly cat.

    A part of me just wishes that I could lay down and die. I have no idea how I am going to tell my family. They are going to hate me. My mom already doesn't like him. I have a little bit of money in a CD that is in my mom's name that I have been trying to get from her since it matured in March. She still hasn't given it to me. I need to get a car. He now wants me to ask her for the money so that I can give it to him. I just feel so trapped.
  5. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Please don't give him the money. At 40, he needs to be standing on his own two feet. He should be caring for you instead of depending on you. i would worry about him being faithful as he has already demonstrated by past practices that commitment mean very little to him. You should not need to build him up. he should trust in you if the relationship is healthy. I would say the reason he doesn't have this trust is because of what he himself has done. I don't know how you feel about the child, but if you don't want to keep it, there are many people out there looking to adopt babies. There are so many options available. Please do not feel trapped. If you want the child, then love it and raise it to the best of your abilities. You are the one that has to decide what is best hun. Know that you do have support and friends here, no matter what you decide. Please take care of yourself. You are important. :hug:
  6. I'm no expert but a few things u might want to think about...
    is this the world u want to bring a child into?
    is that the man u want to father your child?
    will he father your child and be a good father?
    are you willing to sacrafice the rest of your life for your child?
    are you really willing to go through this pregnancy?
    can you handle parenting?
    will u be a good parent?

    there is always a chance of not finding parents to adopt or your child could be adopted by people who turn out to be horrible inside

    you know the options... I hope you chose what's best
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