prepared

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by andyc68, Nov 5, 2007.

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  1. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    maybe its time for me to go, try as hard as i can things don't get any better and i find myself just drifting further away from life and the need to carry on with it.
    the stress and pressure of keeping myself above water and appearing to be ok is overwhelming and tiring.
    i have thought about the pros and cons and the only thing to stay around is that i don't want to hurt my family but that reason is getting dimmer every day.
    i know deep down that once i am on my own i will just fall apart totally, i know that with everything that my life will be like i will struggle to make ends meet, i can't go down that road again, i have spent too much of my life struggling then for the last 6 years i had found happiness, but now that has been torn away from me.
    i wonder whats the point, i don't want to live like this and let people see me like that.
    i feel dead inside, empty.
    i have everything prepared, all loose ends taken care of, it seems i am on borrowed time.
     
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Andy...if you found happiness once, you can find it again...happiness does not depend exclusively on another...you were the one allowing it for yourself...I have been where you are, and have fought back to have a life...I also have grave financial issues, which I created to force me to exit, but having lived, I will have to do the work to resolve them...please know we are here for you and want very much for you to stay with us..big hugs, J
     
  3. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    its just so hard j, if i feel like this now how will i feel when i am truely alone, i am so scared to wake up alone, to come home from a hard days work to an empty house, no one to talk to, no one to cuddle or to share my day.
    i've been there and its awful.
    i am trying really hard to live but i am so tired of these feelings.
     
  4. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    I truly know how hard it is...have you considered having a room/flat mate? if not, i have found that doing things, takes the bite out of some of that anxt...also, you can post when you feel that way and someone here may share your feelings...plez continue to stay with us and let us know how you are doing...all the best, J
     
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