probably going to give in tonight...

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by kindtosnails, Oct 29, 2006.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    i dont think i can stop myself tonight and just have to get this out. its stupid. its not stupid but it is its been over 3 weeks since i cut and the urges have been so bad but i havent let myself give in and its been so hard but this is like the one thing i have to show myself im not completely weak, stop from giving in comletely..yet. its not like i havent SI'd in those weeks but it still feels like an acheivement. but tonight i dont know i dont think i can stop myself. a friend slipped. an online friend ok, but we decided to stop together, five months ago, i slipped after 5 days, pathetic. she didnt. why does this make me want to cut now? i feel so stupid and crap.
  2. u shouldnt say that kind of stuff. if u really put ur mind 2 it im sure u could stop. ive been cutting for 2 yers almost. look if u EVER want 2 talk PM me ok?
  3. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    sorry i still find this reply offensive. dont want to turn it into an argument so ill post here..what exactly did you mean by it? " if u really put ur mind 2 it "
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Blue, you've done well with the stopping so far. Stay on about why you think you need to do it ...private room in chat is always a good way to go.

    If we're in chat me so we can talk about it.

    I think your friend slipping has kind of opened up the flood gates for you, you were struggling and their doing it almost gives you permission to do the same.

    Hang in there hun. :hug: :hug: :hug:
  5. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    thanks dev but its too late anyway. im just now angry because people seem to think i dont try. cant actually express how im feeling right now. havent slept because im so worked up and im sorry if this seems like an overreaction but i dont like having it implied that im simply giving in when the person in question has no clue about my day to day life. and im sure this is unfair what im doing now but i cant really think straight,. sorry. and sorry for disappointing anyone by "not putting my mind to it" as i clearly cant have can i? aggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh
  6. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    Dont punish yourself too much about it. Tommorow is a new day, and a new beginning. It can be the first day in your abstinance from cutting....
  7. kindtosnails

    kindtosnails Staff Alumni

    you know what im not punishing myself for it. firstly it was a week ago. secondly its not just a slip but im ok with that. i dont know why everyone seems to think its so easy. right now cutting is stopping me from doing other things most of the time which if i had i might not be here. im not ready to stop and i never was and all this pressure and acting like SI is the ultimate worst thing just does not help. i agree its a shit coping method but it is so much a part of me that i can not just stop. im sorry im sure you all mean well but its just the mood im in and the way its coming across. i was merely expressing myself and my frustration. i wont in future.
  8. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Ah hun of course u can express yourself.

    If cutting is the only way u can cope at the moment..then so be it.

    I can't talk, I smoke and drink waaaaay too much and my body is complaining something awful about it. When I can I'll cut back and then hopefully stop.

    Hope this will be how you can move forward. Cutting less and then when your ready try to stop again. In the meantime, no one will think less of you for not being able to stop.

    And as MJ said...tomorrow is another day.

    Here if u need me :hug: :hug:
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.