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Probation--after 29.5 years.

Discussion in 'Work and Financial Problems' started by JD4010, Feb 5, 2018.

  1. JD4010

    JD4010 Well-Known Member

    So tomorrow I have a meeting with my boss and someone from HR about my poor work performance. I will be put on probation for 6 months or more. This is after me working here for over 29 years. My depression bogs me down so badly and the stress of the job makes it that much worse. Should be a fun meeting.
  2. Lulabelle

    Lulabelle Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Good luck @JD4010, I'll be thinking of you.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  3. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear this. If you are part of a union, I'd say talk to them about this, though I guess if you were part of a union you probably would have done this already.

    You might want to see if you are eligible for vocational assistance for people with disabilities. They might help you make some adjustments to make your job more tolerable.

    Retirement might be an option to consider, especially since job stress seems to be something that is undermining your health.

    You might also be able to talk to someone who knows something about employment law. If you can't afford an attorney, you may want to see a community legal aid clinic or law school clinic.

    I'm going to tag @M4321
    He may have something to say.

    Imho, the ideal thing would be to postpone the meeting until you've been able to consult with someone who can tell you what's a stake at the meeting and what your options are, but that might not be possible.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  4. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    I am so sorry as i know what this is like all too well. Are you in a union where you work as if so you should contact them as they are there for these type of situations. If due to short notice they cant be there you can ask to postpone meeting until they can be.

    Do you have a contract and/or is there a personnel document which discusses this type of issue as there should be guidelines in that to provide information about the steps etc.

    Is this the first formal meeting to discuss your performance eg have things been mentioned in performance evaluations emails etc? As often there may be 2-3 stages to this process...It sounds similar to a performance improvement plan which is challenging as well as i also know...

    Whether you do have a union or not if they give you a document regarding your performance. I believe you can write at the bottom acknowledging that you received it but reserve the right to respond. Then you can review to determine your response but also if you want share with an attorney or specialist in employment to get advice. If you have documentation which refutes what they are saying or provides circumstances for what they claim this will also give you time to gather that as well.

    And you also may want to consider talking with your therapist and GP as they can also authorize a medical leave due to job stress as that can give you time away from the stress of the job. This can give you time to consider how you want to proceed and even consider retiring which given my circumstances i just did today after 17 years there but turn 55 at end of month so eligible.

    Please take to heart that you are not defined by this job...you are much more than any job and have so much to offer all around you.

    My heart goes out to you as i have and know others have endured this type of situation as well. So i will tag @dugga who i hope wont mind as believe he may have some insights as well.

    Please take to heart that you do matter and you arent alone as we are all here for you. So please keep us posted
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  5. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    Just wanted to know I'm thinking of you today with your meeting. Know how hard this is but hold onto that inner strength that is deep inside of you and know that you will get through this. Sending you hugs.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  6. JD4010

    JD4010 Well-Known Member

    Thanks everyone. I'm approaching the panic phase in advance of this meeting. On the one hand, I'm happy that they care enough to go through this process. On the other hand, I resent the hell out of it. I am not a member of any union; instead I belong to the dreaded management caste. Because of a divorce 3 years ago, I cannot retire...my monthly spousal maintenance payments will last for another 7 years, by which time I will be 65. Plus she gets half of my retirement.

    Just writing this makes me think about the "S word". I'm stuck.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  7. M4321

    M4321 Well-Known Member

    It's difficult for me to give any concrete advice given that I'm not familiar with exact the situation. Are you an at will employee or do you have a contract? If you do have a contract then there might be some remedies you could pursue, if you are just at will that can make it more challenging. If you have any more specific questions let me know.
    DrownedFishOnFire and may71 like this.
  8. littlelucy

    littlelucy Well-Known Member

    Man, that really sucks. I hope it's not too bad.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  9. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    I think there are some cases where women may be deserving of the settlements they get, but it seems to me like a lot of guys get screwed really hard in divorce settlements. Sounds like you may be one of them.

    Seriously, I would never get married in the US just because of the way the laws are written.

    I highly recommend that you follow up with M4321, he knows this stuff.

    Hope that your meeting went well.
    DrownedFishOnFire and drinty like this.
  10. Walker

    Walker Everything Zen Staff Member Safety & Support SF Social Media SF Supporter

    Just wondering what happened with your meeting, man. Let us know...
    JD4010 and DrownedFishOnFire like this.
  11. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    I have been thinking of you ...what was the outcome of the meeting? Sending you hugs. Remember you aren't alone in this as we are here for you,
    JD4010 and DrownedFishOnFire like this.
  12. JD4010

    JD4010 Well-Known Member

    Thanks everyone. I got through the meeting without flipping out. My boss and the HR person are going to be watching me like kindergarten teachers. I have this whole list of expectations that must be met, with check ins every 2 weeks. The good news is, I'm still employed. That bad news is, work drives me batsheet crazy.
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  13. Winter Blues

    Winter Blues SF Supporter

    Hold on in there ... Please. Xx
    DrownedFishOnFire likes this.
  14. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Seeing is Believing Forum Pro SF Supporter


    How many more years left before being eligible for retirement?
  15. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    That is good to hear...just take one task at a time and as one who didn't speak up enough if you find you are having troubles meeting any of the deadlines talk to your supervisor and document why so that can have that in hand if need it later...sending you hugs and lots of encouragement....
    JD4010 likes this.
  16. JD4010

    JD4010 Well-Known Member

    I could go in 2 years, but it would be better to wait for 4 years. Even the 2 years sounds impossible right now. How sad is that?
  17. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Seeing is Believing Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Yeah just keep doing your best, follow the checklist is there a way to re-file for adjustment to reduce the spousal support so you can fend for yourself vs the ex?

    One of the reasons why I'm deathly afraid of marriage.
    JD4010 likes this.
  18. Lady Wolfshead

    Lady Wolfshead Trying to re-dream my dreams

    Just saw this thread now, and sending you (((((((hugs)))))). I've gone through this at work too due to poor performance in the past. I got through it and so will you. I've also had warnings due to absenteeism, compliance and mistakes. If they wanted you gone, you'd be gone by now. I would definitely talk to a disability lawyer (they will usually consult for free) and find out what your rights are. They do have a duty under the law to accommodate you. I've had medical notes that allowed me to work less hours, to work days instead of shift work, and so on.

    Thinking of you and sending you best wishes
    DrownedFishOnFire and JD4010 like this.
  19. JD4010

    JD4010 Well-Known Member

    I need to update the paperwork related to my mental status. Unfortunately, that means having an appointment with my Pdoc. I'd almost rather drink battery acid.
  20. Kiwi2016

    Kiwi2016 Forum Pro

    I know that this wont be easy on so many levels but do as others have said explore disability option or a reduced/alternative work load option with your Pdoc. How are you doing with the expectations list and hope they are being reasonable...sending you positive thoughts as know all too well how hard this is. Sending you hugs.
    JD4010 likes this.