Problem with a "Friend" Continued...

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by friendless, Mar 29, 2010.

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  1. friendless

    friendless Well-Known Member

    A while back I posted that a so-called "friend" was throwing a baby shower for someone we both know. When I was pregnant, I was lucky when this "friend" even just said "you're pregnant! Congratulations!"

    So this "friend" threw the baby shower and said she would email me the invitation and never did, but she did email me photos of the baby shower after the fact. I would say I'm hurt, but now I don't even care. I'm just going to cut ties with this person and avoid them when I see them in public.

    Why do my friendships always turn out like this? Am I just socially inept? This is why I say I have no friends.

    In the past, I have always been a nice and good person but people have always lied to me, used me, and manipulated me. Now I'm definitely becoming mean, angry, spiteful, and antisocial.

    My question is: when so many people, one after another, shit on you how do you cope and stay a nice person?
  2. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    This is a question I have asked myself too and maybe this is just a bullshit "story" I tell myself to get by but I honestly think they have trouble with us because like most people that suffer from mental/mood issues we are very intense and they sense this and are thrown off by it. I really think that is is because here of SF our intensity does not put people off but in real life we all seem to have so few friends that it makes you wonder why such great, kind and caring people have trouble in real life.
    I also can be "flakey" in that I plan/agree to things but then get sad and "flake" out so know that is a factor in my having few friends....all part of my illness.
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You can only be who you are and don't let others cruelty affect your kindness.
    Move on thats all one can do and reach out to new friends and be u because if you are anything else then that doesn't work either. Pain can cause us to become isolated so don't okay keep reaching out
  4. friendless

    friendless Well-Known Member

    I have trouble being assertive. I think I need to work on that and learn to let others know that it's not OK to step on me, but also try to foster being nicer to those that deserve it, and at least polite to people in general.

    Thank you for all of you help.
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    remember to be kind to you okay if you are at peace with who you are then others will be too. You are caring here so you do have the ability to be compassionate and understanding I hope you feel better soon
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