Problems with self harm.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Ellie Grey, Apr 12, 2013.

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  1. Ellie Grey

    Ellie Grey Well-Known Member

    Since a young girl I've self harmed, because of the amount of knowledge I have on the subject, being around self harmers online constantly and talking about it... It's all become very normal for me. I have to stop myself talking about it when I'm talking to people who don't have any experience with this side of things.
    I also forget to cover my scars a lot. My left arm is covered in knife and razor scars and they are quite noticable, they're silver against my skin so... one of the first things you see when looking at my arm.
    My scars make me very depressed because I know that by the time I'm 18 I'm going to have one hell of a lot more because I relapse so often. I know how most people judge self harmers and I know that I will be treated like a 'freak' because of it.
    I wanted to ask people something because it's a very mixed reaction.
    I'd like to say first that everyone knows I'm a self harmer, most of my family know (not all but I've been more open lately) my school know, local doctor and mental health clinic do. My friends know, basically everyone knows. Whilst I am a little ashamed of them I can't take the heat of the summer, I can't constantly wear sleeves to cover them and elbow length mesh gloves are annoying.
    I wanted to ask what people think about a self harmer letting their scars show. It could cause a lot of problems with my family I know, my mother would go ballistic.
    But I can't deal with trying to hide it when everyone knows. I don't think anyone would comment as I rarely see anyone, even on public transport I don't see anyone familiar.

    I know people would consider me an attention seeker. I am not proud of my scars nor do I feel anything positive about them. I don't want to hide them because I don't want to get back into the pattern of being obsessed with them being hidden. The only thing I feel worried about is if children notice it, but you can lie about stuff like that if they're young enough.
    As I can't decide what would be best I wanted to see what other people think, asking close friends and family will be too biased so this is the best thing I can think of.
    Thank you. :)
  2. HelgasAngel

    HelgasAngel Well-Known Member

    I think its up to the self harmer. If they see a problem with it and feel like they should keep them hidden, then they should do that. It's all about how they feel. Even if the self harmer were to keep their scars hidden their mom or dad or family might feel uneasy about it anyway regardless. It's all about whether the self harmer feels comfortable with letting them show, not what others feel about it. They don't have the scars on their arms, now do they? So I say if you cut yourself and feel uncomfortable with the embarassment they might cause, cover them up. Simple as that. If you just don't give a damn like a friend of mine who bears her scars proudly (she's about five months "sober" in terms of cutting herself.) and doesn't give two shits about what people think of them, then show them =p I know some self harmers, those who have managed to stop cutting altogether anyway, who bear their scars as symbols of their will to never give in, as a source of pride, a testament to their ability to overcome adversity. :p
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Have you tried bio oil hun to decrease the scars I think when working around young children it would be wise to cover them up as it may upset them hun just my opinion though
  4. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    If you don't feel embarrassed about the scars, let them show. I feel shame about my own scars, so I hide them. But that's just how I feel about myself. So I wear long sleeves in hot weather, but I did that before I started cutting, because I hate the way I look and I don't want to be noticed. But you have nothing to be ashamed of, and you don't really have to explain yourself to strangers.
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