Hi everyone, I'm not sure what to write here, this is not the kind of thing I usually write about. I'm a university computer science student who sometimes have suicidal feelings. Ever since I was little I've wanted to end my life every now and then; however, due to having such a strong fear of death which directly contradicts my desire to end my life I'm still alive. I'm an atheist. During the last couple of years I've thought more about ending my life, my reasons for this are mainly that I hate myself and that I procrastinate a lot. To be honest it is actually quite a paradox for me to even write about this, because I have since long pretty much established that nothing anyone can just say to me will make things right for me, what exactly can a psychologist tell me that I haven't thought about for myself during the numerous years I've had this issue?