at one point i was on meds. but not anymore. i was taking proc=zac, depakote,abilify,and lamictal. when i take the stuff im like a flatline. i have no emotions at all. the house could be burning down, and i wouldn't care. i've been off them since december and my life has been a roolercoaster. im not sure which is better, flatlines or rollercoasters. when im on meds i wish i could feel something, and when im not taking them im a basketcase. manic depressant, and severely emo disturbed. anyway, i know i need the meds, but i hate taking them... is there something natural or something i can do for the moodswings? at the rate im going im going to go back to meth and heroin if i don't do something. at least when i was using i didn't have the mood swings. i was just terminally depressed. at least that i know how to deal with. been doing it for years. ive been on and off meds since i was a teenager. we all knew there was somehting wrong, but i never stuck around anywhere long enough to get get a diagnosis.i'm part jack rabbit. im a runner, run from everything.