Psychologically dependent on Xanax and alcohol

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Kabukicho, Mar 5, 2014.

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  1. Kabukicho

    Kabukicho Member

    I can't sleep without Xanax. I can't feel happy in the evenings (the way I want to feel) without alcohol. It is a messy situation and it needs to stop, but whenever I try to take a break I last for only about a week before giving into the overwhelming insomnia and anxiety that crop up without my two nasty pets around.

    I guess the equation is: I feel semi-okay when I'm on Xanax and alcohol, and I feel like death without them. So why not use them?
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Why not talk to your doctor about getting some addiction councelling for your alcohol abuse If the medication was ordered for you then you need it the alcohol will only undue what the medication is for Better to get support to find better coping skills then drinking it is only a quick fix then it goes down hill you know that right hugs
  3. Kabukicho

    Kabukicho Member

    Thank you for your kind words. I have actually been doing pretty well with cutting out the alcohol, but then end up compensating for that with increased Xanax usage. I would be open to addiction counseling, but I'm scared that if I talk about having a problem with alcohol, I won't be prescribed benzos anymore. And I'm not even sure I have a "drinking problem." Maybe that's denial. But I'm pretty sure I have an anxiety problem. It's been around all my life, since way before the alcohol started, and it's been crippling. My aim is to get the anxiety under control.

    I guess if the Xanax works, the Xanax works. It is a God drug to me. It improves my quality of life immensely. Maybe it's not so bad to be dependent on it.
  4. Null

    Null Well-Known Member

    I had a similar issue. I don't want to share too much about my situation but I think seeing the doctor is your best bet. I believe (and I could be wrong so you really should talk to your doctor) both alcohol and Xanax mess with the GABA levels in the brain and can make it hard for you to sleep when you stop consuming them. My doctor moved me to a sleep aid to help with that issue. I still have problems with alcohol dependency (I drink when I stress out too much), its not easy to kick, but I sleep better now and I guess that's something.

    I hope you find the help you need. :hugs:
  5. Kabukicho

    Kabukicho Member

    They definitely both wreak havoc on GABA. And it's true that there are better (although probably equally addictive and equally GABA-ergic) sleep aids out there. Ambien, Halcion.

    The next time I see my pdoc I will be honest about my worries about Xanax and maybe see if making a medication switch is in order. I'm not naive enough to think that I won't ever need a benzo or alcohol again. I would have to be living in the freaking Garden of Eden for that to happen. But I want a medication schedule that makes me feel like less of a junky, and one that cuts through the anxiety / depression enough to help me steer clear of alcohol most of the time.

    (I have exhausted other options. I have tried every antidepressant known to man and I have tried every holistic therapy under the sun. They help with the insomnia / dysphoria / anxiety maybe on the magnitude of a 10% boost. Absolutely not optimal.)
  6. AsphyxiateOnMisery

    AsphyxiateOnMisery Well-Known Member

    I can tell you right now that if you tell your doctor you have any kind of addiction problem, there's no way he/she is going to give you any type of controlled medication...especially xanax. So if you really want to get it prescribed, if I were you, I would avoid telling them about your addiction. But you do need some kind of help for it so I would recommend either AA/NA meetings or some kind of outpatient drug counseling. Also, with how much you've said you take Xanax, chances are you're physically addicted to it as well, which means stopping it abruptly would be extremely dangerous and could cause seizures. Not to mention benzo withdrawal is pretty brutal. Speaking as an addict myself though, as long as you keep taking Xanax whether you're getting it off the street or getting it prescribed, it's very unlikely that you're going to be able to maintain a specific schedule with it. Especially when your body gets used to it and you need to keep taking more and more to get the feeling that you want. So I wouldn't even bother with that if I were you. Basically, you're either going to keep popping them like skittles, or you can make the choice to try to get clean. Once you're addicted there's really no middle ground with that. And same thing with the alcohol. Plus, taking the two together, is a really bad combination if you take too much.
  7. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    The xanax is not working anymore. That relief you feel when you take it is not a relief from the anxiety i tis prescribed for it is a relief from the withdrawal symptoms of not having taken it in longer than your body is comfortable with. You can tall your dr and get help with it now before you get worse or you can try to dance around the issue for a few months until even more severely addicted, buying it on the streets, and taking handfuls of other less potent benzos to get by when you can't find the xanax and then get help but you are already addicted and need help. Do yourself the biggest favor you can do and get the help now before it gets worse and you truly find yourself in a miserable place to try to get out of.

    Oh- and the reason you feel kinda okay on them has nothing to do with ho you feel. The thing about addictions is they make you very single minded until the only thing that is really important to you is feeding the addiction. So when you take them , the most important thing in your world is momentarily satisfied so it might seem like you feel better but it is only because you don't care about other things once the urges kick in and anytime you are not feeding the addiction all those other things are still there and you just feel worse for not having done anything about them. Until the the other addiction habits like the lying and stealing kick in and you have even more things to feel bad about.
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Xanax is one evil drug. I was on it for some years at 3mg per day(that's a high dose given for Ireland), I begged my doctor to take me off it, over 5 months I cut down by 0.25MG per week and I came out of it with no withdrawals from the xanax but a few days/or weeks, I can't remember I got extreme anxiety so bad that I was vomiting,retching, couldn't face the world. I was prescribed Valium, which is a little less potent and much longer lasting. I take it everyday and it still has not stopped working for me, even after a year of use. Be careful cutting down from the xanax it can cause seizures. Xanax and alcohol(I have been there) cause blackouts and severe memory loss, I would not advise it. I would talk to your doctor about your issues honestly because that is the only way they are going to be able to help you. Good luck.
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