Pushing me over the edge

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by WhyMeWhy, Feb 14, 2008.

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  1. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    Idk where to start..................................

    Mother is taking methadone & stealing my darvocet as well. That is fatal. She's constantly screamin & cryin over trivial things like it's the end of the fuckin world. I have to put up w/ all this-there is no reasoning w/ her.

    The effect on me is I want to take all my pillls to stop her, atleast she will live on. But 1st I have to fill my prerscription behind her back somehow, which is very difficult to do 'cause of certain people who will tell her everything. Once I have all my pills...... it's the end for me. I can't take it anymore. This will take a little time, but I know I can do it.... no more hellish life..... I can hardly wait &
    I wish I could do it all right now...... :eek:hmy: If all goes as planned, you won't be celebrating my birthday this month. SORRY :sad:
  2. nagisa

    nagisa Staff Alumni

    I really hope you change your mind about this. I don't know you well but I've read a lot of your posts and you seems like a really nice person. Please try to hold on. :hug:

    Man do I ever feel like a hypocrite. :p
  3. :hug: to you both.
  4. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    Thanx. But I'm counting on this. "Just a quiet peaceful death"
    Sound familiar? I believe thats Rage Against The Machine lyrics.
    Anyway..... if I let her get hold of my pills, she will go. I'd rather it be me. Besides..... she does not know all the pills I'm getting soon.

    How ironic: an addict who wants to die that can't stand to see an addict who wants to die. :blink:
  5. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Sorry to hear things are so rough now.please tell us what is going on for you...PM me if I can be there for you..big hugs,J
  6. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Please don't ingest your mother's pills whymewhy. She needs you to keep her safe now, kind of like how you needed her to keep you safe when you were a child. You two need eachother. If one dies then the other will probably die too. Hang in there.
  7. kimailis

    kimailis Active Member

    dave_n is right, if you will die than it will make your mom's condition worse.
    if my mom was in that condition i would slap her and tell her to stop crying and do something about it.
    end of the world? that should be a hell of a show, i would enjoy it.
    till then we have lives to live, work hard and have fun.

    hard work always brings a lot of fun, believe me.
  8. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    You've got it backwards :laugh:
    They are my prescription pills & she is always begging for them. So I've succeeded in filling a prescription behind her back. She always wants to hold my pills so she will have access to them. Not this time. I need them to keep me in a tranquilized mood so maybe I can't take them all at once..... to carry out my (former) plan I'd have to hide them from her till the 19th, when I get even more. Idk what exactly I'm gonna do anymore....
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