• Apologies for the issue with a bizarre redirect on the site earlier today. There was a large server update and an error in an IP address had the traffic routing wrongly. No hacking or anything nefarious and nothing to worry about. Sorry for any stress/anxiety caused. Very best wishes - SF Admin

Question about a long ago potential boyfriend

A_J_R

Well-Known Member
#1
So, this morning I woke up to a message on my facebook from a guy I briefly dated back in the 1990s. He's a peer. And, we have a lot of mutual friends. I haven't opened his message.

The reason I've held off is because I was not very nice to him and it's haunted me for a long time. He didn't deserve the way I treated him, and I always felt like such a coward. We didn't date for very long at all. Like, 2 dates and a couple of hang outs. But he was pretty interested in me, and pursued me heavily for a little while. I just stopped returning his calls. it was horrible. I liked someone else, and just didn't have the guts to tell him.

He's married now, and I'm 99% sure he's totally over it. I think he just saw my name on someone's fb, and reached out. I'm thinking he maybe forgot how horrible I was. I don't know. But I'm sort of afraid to open up anything with him.

This is especially confusing for me, because of my most recent situation with a guy I cared for very much. We were close and he did a lot of terrible things that led to end of everything, and that's why I'm here. It's ironic and I find I'm being extra sensitive, since I could possibly be seen as the jerk in this situation.

That said, I did not do anything like this guy did to me, but I feel horrible about it all the same. This old potential boyfriend is a great person. I was a heel.
 

KM76710

Kangaroo Manager
SF Pro
SF Supporter
#2
Take a chance. That would be how I would do it and have even though on FB I am pretty boring with only about 20 people on friend's list. The 1990s were a long time ago and people change a lot and both of you no doubt realize that. People I knew when younger can and do say I am unrecognizable in many ways, physically and how I behave from my teen and twenties years. You may make a fine new friend.
 

A_J_R

Well-Known Member
#3
Take a chance. That would be how I would do it and have even though on FB I am pretty boring with only about 20 people on friend's list. The 1990s were a long time ago and people change a lot and both of you no doubt realize that. People I knew when younger can and do say I am unrecognizable in many ways, physically and how I behave from my teen and twenties years. You may make a fine new friend.
Thank you! I just read his email. It was very nice. He was just "touching base" and he reminiscent a little about his time in the city we both lived in when we met. I responded. He didn't mention my jerk behavior, and it was a nice enough email that I'm thinking he forgot that part! I don't want to remind him either!
 

Please Donate to Help Keep SF Running

Total amount
$0.00
Goal
$255.00
Top