I'm fairly new to this, I've only been feeling this way for a couple of months now. Basically I had an event happen that's put me in a pretty bad situation that I think would cause anybody to consider killing themselves. The problem is that no matter how much my situation improves (and it has somewhat), I still think about doing it every day. I can't help but feel like... it's still the "right" thing to do. Like it's supposed to happen or something. I feel like if I had a way to do it laying on my nightstand, I'd feel better knowing that it was in reach at any time. I'm a little worried that even IF my situation pans out and all this shit goes away that I'll STILL feel like this, even when I've got my freedom and this whole mess is behind me. I guess my question is is this typical? Do suicidal feelings ever go away? Did your thoughts start with a traumatic event, and are still lingering to this day long after the situation has resolved itself? It'd be interesting if people were typically stuck like this. It could mean that we're all hard-wired for suicidal tendencies (for herd benefit or something) and once that switch is activated it can't be turned off easily.