Question about psychiatrist/psychoanalyst. Please help.

Discussion in 'Therapy and Medication' started by aao, Dec 6, 2012.

  1. aao

    aao Well-Known Member


    So, I've been seeing this psychiatrist who's also a psychoanalyst. Last week was my second ever time seeing him. I'm very, very shy and have a very hard time opening up and talking about myself and my problems and getting to trust people. So, last week I walk in to his office and tells me: "What are you going to talk about today? Talk." And he just remained quiet and stared at me. Me being me, I just froze and didn't know what to say. So he said: "Stop wasting my fucking time!" So I told him about my anxiety attacks, which have been terrible lately and he said that they're my fault, that everything's my fault. And sure enough, that made me have an anxiety attack right there. Every time I think about this I get really anxious.

    So, I have my third appointment tomorrow first thing in the morning, and I'm really dreading it.

    I guess my question is: Do any of you know if this is normal behavior for a psychiatrist or a psychoanalyst?

    Thanks in advance.
  2. lordsalisbury

    lordsalisbury Well-Known Member

    To me, it sounds like the behaviour of an inconsiderate oaf, but I really am NOT an expert, it could be a psychological technique he's using.
  3. Oceans

    Oceans Well-Known Member

    I have to reiterate, I'm not an expect either. Although, I have seen a few people in my time some good and some not so good. It doesn't who you see, if they are transparent with their technique, if that is the case, they should really let you know.

    If a professional treated me as this person did, I personally would not return. I too, am a very shy person and I can't open up that quickly. I need to develop rapport and trust before I share what is going on. How do you feel about how this person treated you? That's what matters most. If we're going to be sharing our vulnerable self to them, we need to feel safe and taken at pace that is right for you.

    I hope you find your way...
  4. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    You need to find a new psychiatrist because this one sounds very disrespectful. If anyone talked to me like that, it would make me even less inclined to open up about my problems. You don't want someone yelling at you and being rude when all you are doing is trying to seek help for what is troubling you. If it's some technique to get you to talk, then it's a damn stupid one. I just think he went about things in a completely wrong manner.
  5. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm sorry you have had this happen. There are many ways therapists/docs could approach the quiet person.

    My doc realized I am "slow to thaw" (i.e., slow to warm up to new people) and he took his time to increase my comfort level. He was kind, considerate, and aware of who I am and what would work to start me opening up. Perhaps this person you're seeing is using a "push you into it" tactic...:dunno:

    But if it's not working for you, you are allowed to say so. If you are shy and can't speak those words, write down your concerns and show him what you've written. Sometimes, I think that people even docs and therapists take a quick read of others and decide how they will approach them, and unless someone makes them take off the blinders, they don't see they aren't achieving the ends they meant to.

    If you can, try to find a way to communicate to him that this is not a good approach, as you apparently feel more like retreating rather than opening up more.
  6. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    WTF! My first therapist was useless where I was concerned and said so after 6 months, but he was always courteous.
    My second one took the time to build rapport and trust, not to say he didnt sometimes scare the shit out of me, but that would be with a chance word or sentence that showed an understanding I wasnt sure I was ready for :unsure:
    If I didnt talk, we sat in silence until I was ready.
    This shrink sounds like a bloody nightmare.
  7. aao

    aao Well-Known Member

    Hello guys.

    Thank you very much all for your responses and for taking the time to post them. So, I went today for my third appointment. Things got better. I talked about things and he didn't judge me, didn't yell at me and didn't say anything unpleasant at all. I feel better.

    I hope things will continue in this same manner.

    Thank you very much all again.