Question (need some advice)

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Bigman2232, Mar 26, 2008.

  1. Bigman2232

    Bigman2232 Well-Known Member

    Ok, this is probably really stupid but I need some advice and this is the only place where I can ask without having to be laughed at (at least not in person).

    I have written an email to one of my friends saying how I have developed feelings for her as more than a friend. I think she knows already but this would just make it complete and I know they aren't returned but I just sorta need to finally let her know.

    In less than a month she will be done University and in all likelihood we will never see each other again. So I figure if this causes things to be too weird, it's only a month.

    Now to the question: should I send her the email or just leave it the way it's been for the last 2 1/2 years and never tell her?
  2. whybeherenow

    whybeherenow Active Member

    Hi - I know email is easier - but if you want to do this - and why not if you are soon to loose contact - it is much much better to do this face to face. Yes I know much harder, but doing it via email is I think not the right way to go. If you do it via email, you may get no response at all. How would this feel? If you do it face to face, it may be unpleasant, but at least no doubt will be left in your mind, and you will know that you did what you needed to do.
  3. Bigman2232

    Bigman2232 Well-Known Member

    I might do it face to face if I could get the chance. I haven't actually been able to see her in over a month cause she's busy with the final year wrap up. Just the quick, hey, how are you on facebook and msn.

    And as an email I can at least make sure I say what I want, the way I want. No way to stop me in mid sentence or to try and change the subject.

    I don't really expect a response, it's more just so I know that I got it out there, so I don't have the whole "you should have at least said it" going on in my head like I already do now.
  4. Mortem

    Mortem Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I'd say go for the email.
  5. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    Send her an e-mail, even if it doesn't work out, at least you tried and won't spend the rest of your life wondering 'what if.' :smile:
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I second that:smile:
  7. Christianv2

    Christianv2 Well-Known Member

    I say do it face to face. I know it can be really akward but those few minutes of awkwardness will be worth it if it becomes something and if not, atleast youll have no doubt and not have to think of what if's years later.
  8. Lead Savior

    Lead Savior Well-Known Member

    My vote is face to face
  9. Bigman2232

    Bigman2232 Well-Known Member

    Thanks for the input. I'm likely emailing it unless I actually see her in the next day or two or unless I chicken out completely and leave it unsaid.
  10. hammockmonkey

    hammockmonkey Well-Known Member

    tell her face to face. Whats the worst thing that happens, you never see her again?
  11. Hae-Gi

    Hae-Gi Banned Member

    I completely agree on this... as said, don't just send an e-mail... you may get no reply at all, possibly leaving you in doubt for years. Don't just call, either... face to face definitely is the best choice... if it gets awkward, it won't really matter, in the end, anyway, right?
  12. Bigman2232

    Bigman2232 Well-Known Member

    Well I sent it (3 days ago), no response (I told her I didn't expect one). Doesn't matter. I'm gone in a few hours anyways
  13. Squire

    Squire Active Member

    By gone you better mean out to the shops and not dead.

    You can't 'go' without a definite answer, her internet might be down or there could be a problem with her e-mail server for all you know.
    Do it in person.


    You know what? If she doesn't give you the answer you're looking for, prove her wrong. Live your life how you want, you're an amazing person and if she can't see that then it's her fault. Everyone is amazing.
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 29, 2008
  14. Bigman2232

    Bigman2232 Well-Known Member

    I had planned to go tonight anyways. It has nothing to do with her. I'm alone, can't focus and can't do the two major assignments I have. I have to go and it is only minorly even related to her at all.
  15. thedudeabides

    thedudeabides Active Member

    if youve known her for 2 1/2 years you be the judge of how she will react to it face to face, i vote face to face, no i beg you to do it face to face(if you get the chance) regret is one of the most painful feelings in my opinion and emailing her can still leave you wondering, the subject is too important to send communicate it to her with a computer instead of your voice. just my opinion though.
  16. googonz

    googonz Active Member

    I am only sixteen, but if you really love this girl, run to her, adn tell her in person. If she loves you back, horray, if she doesn't, then it wasn't meant to be. If I were you, I would be out the door running right now. But I am still in question of my sexuality, as of now I am bi-ish, kind of. More gay than bi, but damn women are sexy!