I have come to realize that my life was never meant to be. It started after graduating high school I was an Airforce Reserve. I really wanted to join the military, but then I had a physical fight with my brother. He ended up calling the police like a little baby after I choked him out and I got arrested for Domestic Violence, but it was really self defense he punched me in the face what he suspect? Now I have to pay a ticket which was fine because I had a job, I ended up losing my job because a girl at my work had sex with my friend at work, who's girlfriend works there to. I happend to walk in the bathroom to take a piss to catch him cheating on his girlfriend. Of corse girls are all fucking slutty bitches and only care about themselves she got me fired saying I called her a ***** when I never said anything. So I lost my job and then get pulled over for a broken tail light, he tells me to fix it then get it signed by a cop which I did and I mailed it in. Few months later still can't find any work, slowly started losing confidence in myself and no longer hanged out with close friends. Then I get a letter in the mail saying my license is suspended unless I pay a ticket by July 3rd, 2010. I'm also in dept with banks and credit companies, because I been unemployed for so long. I just don't see why God would care about me. Everything thats happening in my life it just points to no God and that my life is pointless. On top of on the vurge of having warrants for my arrest for failure to pay tickets and go to my domestic violence classes I really want to know how to kill my self in quick fassion. If anybodys gunna say don't kill yourself your lifes important you will go to hell for eternity, you cause pain to your family, there still hope fuck you!!! You have a job I bet and have somebody that cares about you. Only person that cares about me is my mom, I found out my dad aint even my dad, which makes me a mistake. Please tell me I have a <mod edit-gentlelady-methods> Matter of fact I'm gunna write a suicide letter to my family write after I post this. So maybe I become famous when somebody reads this who knows all I know is I have nothing going for me in my 19 years of age, you need money to have a girlfriend I may have good looks but I'm a lonely broke fuckhead that nobody gives a shit about. Gooday ladies and gentlemen I'm finally going to kill myself.