Quiet Psych - anybody had the silent treatment?

Discussion in 'Therapy and Medication' started by downunder, Feb 19, 2009.

  1. downunder

    downunder Well-Known Member

    I had to see a professor pysch for a 2nd opinion, she would ask a question, I would answer and then silence felt like about 5 minutes. I started looking around the room, playing with the ring on my finger, scratching my back and then doing it all again in between questions.

    I hate the silence game. It was painful.

    She would say ".................. says you have lost a lot of weight" i say "I don't think so" then silence .........................................................

    She would say ",,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, says you are depressed" I say "I don't think so, then silence ........................................

    It went on like this for an hour!!!!!!!!!!!! Next time I think I will bring a magazine in to read in between questions. Hopefully there will not be a next time.
     
  2. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    That does sound painful. I wonder if she's hoping that by being silent you will fill in the gaps and talk about whatever you want to talk about. I know in counselling training it's often said that silence isn't a bad thing.. that it can help give the client time to think and talk. I don't know if this is what the psych is thinking but it's obviously making you feel uncomfortable and having the opposite effect for you. Maybe you could tell her this? :hug:
     
  3. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Ack, I hate those appointments too. Normally they use those silences to allow time for thought/reflection or to allow you space to think.

    I agree with Jenny about maybe mentioning how you feel. I normally find I get loud and fill the gaps by talking garbage and saying I don't like silences and changing the subject, so I'm actually very impressed you survived the silence.

    Each therapist/psych, etc. will realise that each client needs something different, so mybe if this psych understands this doesn't work for you he can adapt his method and you might find a more comfortable relationship develops.
     
  4. downunder

    downunder Well-Known Member

    I was only seeing her for a one off appointment as a second opinion. I even said to the psych that sent me there, "she is not going to do silence games is she?" and she told me no. Shouldn't the pscyh realise after 30 mins that obviosuly the silence game is not working, if she wants more out of me shouldn't she be prompting me for more?
     
  5. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    I get the feeling that's what most therapists would hope will happen.. afteral the sessions should be a place for the clients to talk and for the therapist to listen and not the other way round. But yes i agree that after 30 minutes and it obviously not working i think the psych should have realised it wasn't getting anywhere and helped you along by asking open ended questions. :hug: