RACKED by guilt. i wasnt there

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by jxdama, Aug 31, 2010.

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  1. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    he was planning to die last night. he called at 2am and i didnt wake up when the phone rang. i am a lowlife piece of crap.
     
  2. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    Its not your fault, you can't help not waking up for the phone.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 31, 2010
  3. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    You are not a low life piece of crap. We cannot always be there. We have our own health to think of. Sometimes we just do not hear things. There are any number or reasons why you did not hear the phone. We can only try our best to be there.
     
  4. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    i might have made a difference
     
  5. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    Everyone sleeps, you can't help that. You said he was planning to , is he ok?
     
  6. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    no word
     
  7. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    I hope he's ok, he has my best wishes. He obviously thinks a lot of you or he wouldn't of called you, he would not want you to feel bad about that. Its just unfortunate he called when you were a sleep.
     
  8. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    i dont understand why i didnt wake up
     
  9. Decode

    Decode Well-Known Member

    My phone alarm wakes me up every morning but if my phone rings in the night i don't usually wake up. I guess this is normal it just depends how deep you were sleeping. He would have known you would be asleep, it was out of your control there was nothing you could do. You shouldn't feel guilty.
     
  10. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You were obviously very tired.. I sleep thru the phone alot and even when I take a nap during the day I don't hear the yard guys mowing right outside of my window..Don't be so hard on yourself.. If you could have been there you would have been..
     
  11. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    Even if you had woken to the call he was probably ringing to say goodbye and there would be nothing you could do....don't blame yourself...
    I hope he changed his mind and is ok..
     
  12. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    It's not your fault, you would have been there if you could. :hug:
     
  13. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    If someone is really determined to take his/her own life, then there isn't much you can do. I hope your friend is okay. :sad:
     
  14. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    i feel bad
     
  15. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    I know. :hug: It's normal to feel bad. But you have to remember it's not your fault. You didn't do it on purpose.
     
  16. ThinkingCap

    ThinkingCap Well-Known Member

    Really, the only time you should feel bad is if you blatantly ignored the call completely. You were asleep, there's nothing you could have done. I'm sorry this is happening to you, and I hope that everything is alright, but just know that you did nothing wrong.
     
  17. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    It is hard to be there for someone in this way, especially when you too have issues to deal with. I try my best to help people when I can, but there is no way I can be their life support. That is why I try to lead them to where I get my life support, and Yahweh never sleeps. Don't beat yourself up, and I pray your friend is alright. Blessings..
     
  18. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    i failed.
     
  19. ThinkingCap

    ThinkingCap Well-Known Member

    How have you failed? The desperation in your posts here shows that you care so much, you can't be blamed for this. Have you heard anything else from him?
     
  20. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    It's not your fault. :hug:
     
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