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i havent been here for a long while now,thought i was getting better,but now i find that im back,im not better,in fact i feel just as bad.but i had a taste of real life in the real world and it was amazing.for once i felt alive, i met people, i laughed and even listened to happy music!maybe its just tonight im on a downer,maybe it will go on longer, who knows, im not in control of my destiny, but somebody , somewhere, is. im only ableto write this down tonight because i had a few vodka's, i know i shudnt drink on the tablets but what the hell , you only live once, thank god, i couldnt do it a 2nd time.
hey before i forget, all you people that helped melast time,thankyou so much.
im sorry if none of this makes sense but i am writing what im thinking, as im thinking it!crazy huh!but i know now that its not just me who has these stupid thoughts and if by doing this, it makes someone else unafraid of writing and being able to express their feelings, then its worth it, maybe i'll just save their life.i always wanted to be some kind of hero!
hey guys nobody here thinks youre mad,some of this stuff youre reading goes really deep,and it takes alot of guts to post on this site,but once you have done it the first time then it will just flow in future.nobody will think youre crazy, youre just normal, well as normal as depressed people get anyhow!we are all at different stages, some of u arent even at the medication stage yet.i promise that once u open up to one of us or even a few of us, then u will be on the road to recovery.its a long slow hard and painful journey to take, but it is worth it.stick at it, keep on going, you really arent alone. these people helped me so they can help anybody, go for it, do it and get better. i sampled real life again and i am going to go back there.

you are never alone

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