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Random bad day feelings (trig)

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by AfraidofMyself, May 27, 2007.

  1. I am so lonely right now.
    My day started out fine--it was good up until a few hours back.
    I was left alone at the cash register at work and I noticed the box cutter laying on it. I started playing with it, looking at it a bit. I decided I was bored enough to just start slicing up paper and when I felt it slide through the sheet it just drove me nuts.
    I just wanted to cut myself up. I wanted to bleed everywhere.
    I purposely nicked myself here and there so nothing was so obvious.

    I want someone to hold me, I really do.
    I want someone to kiss my forehead as I lay against them and tell me they love me or that I'm special to them or...something.
    I guess that's what I really, really want--to be very special to someone.
    I know when me and my ex had issues I brought it up a little--that I felt that I was not special to him at that moment.

    I am tired of being hurt, being confused, being distressed, being sad...being me...
    I want to be cared about, be happy, know what's going on...

    Please, I just want one good day...just one...

    I just feel like such a nuisance.
    I feel like a burden to everyone.
    I'm just wasting everyone's time.
    I want to be the world to somebody out there...

    Oh...maybe tomorrow will be better...
    maybe somehow the night will get better...
    Doubtful...already cried, cut, and probably will have a panic attack and another cry before sleep...gah...
  2. I'm sorry I haven't been very supportive. I hope things get better for you. Take care.
  3. You've been great to me. I think you've been very supportive and helpful. I thank you for being there for me. :hug: