ranting again

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Sorry if I make no sense in this rant.. but I need to get it out before I explode at the person in question.

i wish you werent so arrogant, I mean I SO dont want to say 'I told you so.' and I'm not going to... I dont think. thankfully for you i'm nicer than that. And theres no point because all thats gonna happen is that the rest of the team is going to get pissed too. If anything they've already noticed this. You're becoming a control freak - wait no, you aready are one. And personally I think that you've let yourself get too big for your boots... you strut about the stage like you own it all - which is good for your part, but it carries on once you're offstage too. G, T, S and R all agree with me... you've become a control freak, and we cant tell you that. Why? because you wont listen to us, and O isn't any help either... she may be the teacher in charge of all this but shes too much of a softie and so you talk back and snap at her too.

And when you storm out in the middle of rehearsal yet again having a tantrum, and leave us all, and say that you're not coming back... who is it that goes and convinces you to come back and sort this out? Me. Yep, the person that you love to hate... its ironic, isnt it? I dont know if you can see this or not but we cant afford to not get along... and so i compromise things for you for the sake of the rest of us. I mean gee, so you hate me. I dont care that you do, but for heavens sake dont let this carry on in here too, its a TEAM EFFORT and you're trying to turn it all into your own show. You basically wrote the whole script single handedly, when we all tried to pitch in too, isnt that enough as it is?

The performance is a week away, and we're making more props again tomorrow night. I can so picture tomorrow going absolutely nowhere, and thats whats prolly gonna happen while you're still pissed at everyone - namely me. Its a freaking bitch fight between you and me... not everyone else too. you're not only dragging me down when you do this, but everyone else too. you COULD be slightly less selfish at least.

Its a bit sad actually... somehow I get the idea that you think because you're the oldest out of the seven of us that you can completely dominate everything. Its a bit sad dont you think... I'm only a whole five days younger than you are. and S even thinks that you dont act your age. I dont blame her.

and whats even more sad is that I can see the parellels in this and at home too... at home I'm the peacemaker/therapist... at school I'm still the peacemaker, teacher, therapist... and on top of all this i STILL am your normal school student. I'm peacemaker at home... and so its carried onto school too. it takes a lot out of you you know? to swallow your pride and compromise. Although i dont know if you'd know that or not... I've yet to see you make a single compromise with anyone. And all this time I've been the one to try and make things run a bit more smoothly again.

What I find even more confusing is that you dont listen to O, or even your bestie.. or anyone else in the group... and yet when I become peacemaker again to settle everything, you still listen. you make no sense to me sometimes. i mean, you allegedly hate me. and yet when i convince you to come back and sort this all out... you actually do it. I mean, wtf? make up your mind... do you hate me or not? I dont care either way, but it WOULD make things slightly easier for me and everyone else if you just sorted out that tiny little thing.
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