Raspberry flavoured condoms

Discussion in 'Welcome' started by funkyfrog, Jul 16, 2008.

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  1. funkyfrog

    funkyfrog Member

    Well if that didn't get your attention I don't know what will...

    I'm Paul, and I need some help sorting my life out. All my life I have been lying to myself, friends, girlfriends and family about who I am, what I do and that I'm happy. I am so miserable and depressed and I'm sick of pretending to be happy. I'm sick of pretending to be someone I'm not, just to be loved. I think I am dull and boring and completely uninteresting.

    This has come to a head recently with losing L because I lied to her. The kindest, smartest, most beautiful girl to ever take an interest in me and I fuck it up because I felt I had to lie to her about who I was. I am so insecure about everything. I also feel so guilty about posting on here when there are so many more people with worse problems, genuine reasons for feeling suicidal. OK, so my mum abused me as a kid, but that doesn't explain why I'm so down about myself now and many people have been through a lot worse and survived.

    Anyway, this rant is going nowhere, I'm just very grateful to have found you guys online (Melissa, you rock!) and I hope to befriend more of you soon as we work towards a happier future for us all.

    Contact details will be in my profile soon, please please get in touch if you ever want to talk about anything.

  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    :welcome: to the forum Paul. I am sorry you feel as if you have to hide who you really are in order to be loved. You will find this to be a common thread here. Most of us do mask our true feelings and come to a point that it becaomes too much to keep it up. You do not have to wear that mask here. Take it off and feel free to express yourself. I am glad you found us. You will find support and understanding with us. :hug:
  3. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    Hi Paul, welcome to the site, some of the things you wrote describe my own outlook/mental state pretty accurately, and Im sure countless others on SF. I hope you enjoy the site and make plenty of friends here :)
  4. kenny

    kenny Well-Known Member

    Hi Paul

    I can identify with some of what you have written. It's easy to create a false persona and hide behind it. I think a lot of people use this as a self defense mechanism. but sometiimes we have to let the guard down.

    I think you'd be surprised how much damage abuse can do. My advice is to speak to your GP and find out about counselling/psychology services available to you.

    we're here to listen anytime.

    take care.
  5. sakuragirl

    sakuragirl Well-Known Member

  6. famous.last.words

    famous.last.words Forum Buddy

    welcome to the forum Paul :hug:
  7. DrowningInTears

    DrowningInTears Well-Known Member

    tasty :tongue:
  8. nagisa

    nagisa Staff Alumni

    Welcome to SF, hun. :smile: :hug:
  9. butterflies32

    butterflies32 Well-Known Member

    WElcOMe To SF
  10. innocencexisxlove

    innocencexisxlove Well-Known Member

  11. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Hi, welcome. The title certainly did catch my attention! Lawl.
    I hope you find all the support you need here and enjoy your stay with us.
  12. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    welcome to the forum :hug:
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